IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

People nowadays tend to have children at older ages. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

In the
last
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 few years, the phenomenon of
woman
Fix the agreement mistake
women
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 giving
birth
Use synonyms
 at older ages has been popular than ever before, especially in big cities
due to
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 the escalation of living and education costs for
children
Use synonyms
.
This
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 essay will discuss the advantages and drawbacks
regarding
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
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 issue.
To begin
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 with, having
children
Use synonyms
 at
advanced
Correct article usage
an advanced
show examples
Check wording
age enable
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enable
Correct subject-verb agreement
enables
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 them to be more
focus
Replace the word
focused
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 on
Correct pronoun usage
their career
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career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
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,
thus
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increase
Wrong verb form
increasing
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 productivity and eventually
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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leads
Wrong verb form
leading
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 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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higher economic growth.
Moreover
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, by extending the time of working, it will save more money amid the higher
of
Correct word order
cost of
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 living and education
cost
Correct word order
apply
show examples
to prepare their
children
Use synonyms
 when they are adults in the future.
For example
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,
annual
Correct article usage
the annual
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 tuition cost
in
Change preposition
at
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University
Correct article usage
the University
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 of Indonesia has increased by 217% in 2025 compared to the previous decade.
Besides
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, giving
birth
Use synonyms
 at
the
Correct article usage
an
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 older age
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
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 parents more time to study parenting skills amid drug abuse and alcohol
addictive
Replace the word
addiction
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, which means parents must have strong
mentally
Replace the word
mental
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to
Check wording
abilities to
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 nurture their kids.
However
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, having
children
Use synonyms
 at
advanced
Correct article usage
an advanced
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 age
also
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 has its serious shortcomings. Research revealed that giving
birth
Use synonyms
 at 30s and 40s
lead
Correct subject-verb agreement
leads
show examples
 to miscarriage, and in some cases
caused
Wrong verb form
causes
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 the death
to
Change preposition
of
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baby
Correct article usage
the baby
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 and
mother
Correct article usage
the mother
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.
In addition
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, there are other risks
such
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 as
down
Fix capitalization
Down
show examples
 syndrome and high blood pressure,
thus
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 regular monitoring and a healthy lifestyle
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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 required to mitigate these risks. In conclusion, giving
birth
Use synonyms
 at
advanced
Correct article usage
an advanced
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 age has its own
beneficials
Correct your spelling
benefits
,
for instance
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, more
stable
Correct word order
apply
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financially and mentally
.
Correct word order
stable.
show examples
However
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, it
also
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 carries some serious risks to
baby’s
Correct article usage
the baby’s
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 health
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such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as
down
Fix capitalization
Down
show examples
 syndrome and high blood pressure. With
well
Correct word choice
proper
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 preparation, the risk related to
this
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 issue will be mitigated properly.

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task response
State your view clearly in the last part. Say if you think the good things are bigger than the bad or the other way.
task response
Make the plan first. Put a small note at the start that you will talk about both sides and then give your own view at the end.
coherence
Use simple link words to show order: First, Also, Then, But, In short.
coherence
Keep ideas in order. One idea per paragraph. Do not go back to an old idea.
task response
Give clear proof or example for major points. Do not add facts that you cannot prove.
content
The essay shows a real effort to cover both sides.
coherence
There is a clear overall topic and some linking words used.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic

IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.

Answer structure for the type of essay

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – advantages
  • Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • The main advantage is...
  • The disadvantage of this...
  • The main benefit...
  • Despite these advantages...
  • One possible drawback...

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