Some people think that governments should spend money on public services and facilities rather than on arts, such as music and painting. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some
people
Use synonyms
think that money should be spent on public services and public infrastructure
instead
Linking Words
of artistic activities
such
Linking Words
as
music
Use synonyms
and painting.
Although
Linking Words
I agree that
governments
Use synonyms
need to invest money in public facilities, I believe that they
also
Linking Words
need to spend money on the arts. On the one hand,
governments
Use synonyms
have the responsibility to improve
people
Use synonyms
’s quality of life. If
people
Use synonyms
live in a place
that is
Linking Words
difficult to live in or hard to access, it can seriously affect their daily lives.
Therefore
Linking Words
, in cities where most
people
Use synonyms
live,
governments
Use synonyms
need to invest in public transportation, sports centres, and other public facilities.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, urban development is
also
Linking Words
related to how developed a city is. These factors are important evaluation criteria and are
also
Linking Words
crucial for other countries to gain an understanding of our country.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, bringing
people
Use synonyms
together and providing entertainment in the places where they live is
also
Linking Words
a responsibility of
governments
Use synonyms
. Holding
music
Use synonyms
events and public art exhibitions can allow
people
Use synonyms
to relax and immerse themselves in a stressful world.
For instance
Linking Words
,
governments
Use synonyms
can hold
music
Use synonyms
shows on national holidays. On these days,
people
Use synonyms
usually have time off work, so many citizens can participate in and enjoy these activities.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, encouraging
people
Use synonyms
to take part in
music
Use synonyms
or art events can
also
Linking Words
help reduce crime rates.
This
Linking Words
shows that
people
Use synonyms
need entertainment in their lives, rather than constantly feeling stressed by work. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
it is essential for
governments
Use synonyms
to invest in public services and infrastructure to improve
people
Use synonyms
’s quality of life, I believe that funding the arts is
also
Linking Words
necessary.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Task Response: Make your position clear in the opening sentence and keep a tight focus on how much you agree. In the conclusion, restate your view clearly. Add one or two stronger, direct examples that show the point you make.
coherence and cohesion
Coherence and Cohesion: Use a clear plan for each paragraph. Start with one main idea, then explain it with two or three simple points. Use linking words to connect ideas smoothly and avoid long, messy sentences.
task response
Balanced view with discussion of both sides.
coherence
Clear paragraphing and use of linking words.
What to do next:
Look at other essays: