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Writing Samples
Band 7

The table below shows how the UK unemployed spent their time last year.

The table shows the percentages of unemployed
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
 in the UK who spent
time
Use synonyms
 on various
activities
Use synonyms
 in the morning and
afternoon
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, there were clear gender differences in how unemployed
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
 spent their
time
Use synonyms
.
Women
Use synonyms
 devoted significantly more
time
Use synonyms
 to domestic
activities
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
housework
Use synonyms
 and shopping,
whereas
Linking Words
men
Use synonyms
 were more engaged in job hunting and outdoor
activities
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
,
both
Use synonyms
 genders tended to spend more
time
Use synonyms
 on leisure
activities
Use synonyms
 in the
afternoon
Use synonyms
 than in the morning. In the morning, unemployed
women
Use synonyms
 spent almost half of their
time
Use synonyms
 on
housework
Use synonyms
 (49%), which was by far the most common activity for
this
Linking Words
 group. Shopping (26%) and job hunting (16%) were
also
Linking Words
 relatively popular among
women
Use synonyms
.
By contrast
Linking Words
,
men
Use synonyms
 were more likely to focus on job hunting (22%) and shopping (20%),
while
Linking Words
 only 19% of them engaged in
housework
Use synonyms
. Notably,
men
Use synonyms
 were far more involved in gardening than
women
Use synonyms
, at 14% compared with just 2%. In the
afternoon
Use synonyms
, leisure
activities
Use synonyms
 became more prominent for
both
Use synonyms
 genders. Watching television accounted for 14% of
men
Use synonyms
’s
time
Use synonyms
, making it their most common activity, followed closely by gardening (13%).For
women
Use synonyms
,
housework
Use synonyms
 remained the dominant activity at 21%,
while
Linking Words
 visiting friends or relatives and shopping
both
Use synonyms
 accounted for 17%. Very small proportions of
both
Use synonyms
men
Use synonyms
 and
women
Use synonyms
 spent
time
Use synonyms
 playing sport or staying in bed during the
afternoon
Use synonyms
.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, time, activities, afternoon, housework, both with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
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