IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3

In some countries,small number of people earn extremely high salaries.Some people believe that this is good for the country.but others think that governments should not allow salaries above certain levels Discuss both these views and give your own opinion

In some countries, a minimal
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amount
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number
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 of
people
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 earn
substanially
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substantially
 high salaries.
While
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 some believe that
this
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 has a good impact on the
country
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, others believe that there should be a salary ceiling. In my opinion, when some
people
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 earn considerably high salaries, they can have a good
imapct
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impact
 on
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country
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the country
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 and society. Some believe that the
goverment
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government
 should limit the
amount
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 of
money
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 some
people
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 earn for multiple reasons. To name one, when the wage gap is extremely high, the
expensses
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expenses
 of everyday items and services may rise to be too high for
the
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apply
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people
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 earning less. Another one is that when some companies offer a considerable
amount
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 of
money
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, small businesses may suffer from a lack of
experinced
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experienced
 applicants.
Lastly
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, a fear of
monopolization
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monopolisation
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 in markets
,
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apply
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such
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 as real estate and the food industry.
On the other hand
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, when certain
people
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 earn a high
amount
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 of
money
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, they can nurture the
country
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, especially the rural areas.
For example
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, they can help fund small businesses in order to grow and be more profitable.
Furthermore
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, they can offer more
ammenities
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amenities
 in rural areas.
Also
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, by earning more
money
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, they can increase the number of job opportunities and build more housing
projectes
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projects
. In conclusion, I believe that some
people
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 earning a significant salary is good for the community
,
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apply
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 and the
country
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 in general.

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structure
Plan the essay with three parts: a short intro that states the topic and your view, two body parts that discuss both sides, and a short conclusion that restates your view.
language
Use simple spelling and words. Fix errors such as 'imal', 'definitely' etc. Try: 'a small number of people', 'substantially high salaries', 'government', 'habiting'.
content
Provide clear examples for each point. One or two strong examples help.
cohesion
Link ideas with clear linking words: also, but, for example, in addition.
structure
Use paragraphs: one idea per paragraph.
perspective
You state both sides of the issue.
conclusion
You give a clear view at the end.
content
There are ideas about real world effects like helping small business.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • salaries
  • high
  • country
  • people
  • government
  • believe
  • good
  • allow
  • earn
  • level
  • view
  • opinion
  • economic
  • growth
  • inequality
  • society
  • talented
  • individuals
  • innovation
  • productivity
  • tax
  • revenue
  • public
  • services
  • education
  • healthcare
  • gap
  • rich
  • poor
  • problems
  • crime
  • unrest
  • cap
  • fair
  • pay
  • workers
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