IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The map below shows 2 possible sites (S1 and S2) of a new super market planned for the town of GARLSDON

The map illustrates that there are two possible
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 a new
super market
Use the right word
supermarket
show examples
 that will be
build
Wrong verb form
built
show examples
 in the Garlsdon
Town
Use synonyms
. The first side is S1 and the second one is S2.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can clearly be seen that S1 and S2 are located in different
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
.
It
Correct pronoun usage
They
show examples
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 far from each other and
divided
Verb problem
are divided
show examples
 by a railway that
cross
Correct subject-verb agreement
crosses
show examples
 the
town
Use synonyms
. The location of the first site (S1) is in the north of the railway
Linking Words
while
Punctuation problem
, while
show examples
 the S2 is
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the south side. In terms of the first
area
Use synonyms
, S1 is found in the countryside of Garlsdon. Precisely, it is in the northwest of the
town
Use synonyms
.
Moreover
Linking Words
, S1
only
Verb problem
is only
show examples
 near from
industry
Replace the word
industrial
show examples
area
Use synonyms
 and close
by
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the main roads
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 are 12 km
to
Change preposition
from
show examples
Hindon
Punctuation problem
Hindon,
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 10.000
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
. Regarding the second site, S2 is in the centre of the
town
Use synonyms
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 no traffic zone.
Although
Linking Words
 not as near as S1, S2
Linking Words
also
Verb problem
is also
show examples
 accessible to
industry
Correct article usage
the industry
show examples
area
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, the S2
area
Use synonyms
within
Verb problem
is within
show examples
 reach
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
 two main roads
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 are 16 km to Bransdon and 25 km to Cransdon.
The both
Correct determiner usage
Both
show examples
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that
Correct determiner usage
apply
show examples
Use synonyms
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
respectively
Rephrase
apply
show examples
have 15.000 and 29.000
population
Fix the agreement mistake
populations
show examples
.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words area, town with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • site selection
  • supermarket
  • residential areas
  • main roads
  • public transport
  • traffic congestion
  • peak shopping hours
  • parking availability
  • suppliers
  • delivery logistics
  • amenities
  • shopper convenience
  • environmental implications
  • green spaces
  • urban development
  • economic development
  • job creation
  • local businesses
  • market saturation
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