IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

The graphs below show information about citizenship in the UK. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main points and make comparisons where relevant.

The line graph and bar chart show the information about the inhabitants in the UK.
Overall
Linking Words
, in both
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
charts, the information was given in thousands.
While
Linking Words
 the line graph gives knowledge about citizenship, the bar chart shows the places where new citizens begin. The line graph starts at 30 in 1962, after which the figure experienced a slight increase to 40 in 1970. After slightly decreasing to 35, the figure rose significantly to 65 in the middle of 1980 and 1990. It was dropped to 60 in 1990, before falling considerably to 40. Despite
this
Linking Words
 levelling off,
this
Linking Words
 climbed significantly
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 100 in 2000, and
finally
Linking Words
, the figure was finished at 120 in 2002.
By contrast
Linking Words
, in the bar chart , Asia had the highest number of citizens in 1996 with 19.
While
Linking Words
 Africa and Europe , and the Americas were the same with 9, Australasia and others were just 5.
Then
Linking Words
, in 2002 the Asia had the highest amount of inhabitants with as in 1996, with 50. Despite Africa and Europe , and the Americas being the same in 1996, in
2002
Punctuation problem
2002,
show examples
 Africa had a larger number of inhabitants than Europe and the Americas.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "show" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "information" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significantly" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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