Serious violent crimes among people who are under 18 are becoming more common. Some people think that children who commit serious crimes should be treated like like adults,while others would say they should be rehabilitated. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Serious violent
crime
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among
people
Use synonyms
who are under 18
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
becoming
wide
Correct word choice
widespread
show examples
. Some
people
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believe that teenagers who commit serious
crimes
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should be treated as
adults
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.
Although
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
I side with the latter view that
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
think
Correct subject-verb agreement
thinks
show examples
that
criminals
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who
under
Verb problem
are under
show examples
18 should be rehabilitated because they believe governments can prevent
crimes
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through introducing more psychological subjects at school. The primary reason why they support the idea like
criminals
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who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
under 18 should be treated as
adults
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because they think violent
criminals
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are re-offended
Wrong verb form
re-offend
show examples
after rehabilitation. Former viewers want to prevent their children from
come
Wrong verb form
coming
show examples
across
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
crime
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.
In addition
Linking Words
, after rehabilitation,
criminals
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could well
be
Verb problem
apply
show examples
commit violent
crimes
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. If
criminals
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who
under
Verb problem
are under
show examples
18 are treated as
adults
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, they would understand it is wrong as
adults
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.
Moreover
Linking Words
, former
thinker
Fix the agreement mistake
thinkers
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Check wording
apply
show examples
tend to think who commit
first
Correct article usage
the first
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crime
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can commit
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crime
Correct article usage
a crime
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again.
An another
Correct determiner usage
Another
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reason why I support the latter opinion because
criminals
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who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
under 18
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
should be rehabilitated through
Correct article usage
the governments
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governments
Check wording
government's
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strict laws and psychological support. I strongly believe that serious violent
criminals
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are treated
as
Change preposition
according to
show examples
their age.
Additionally
Linking Words
, if children are treated
as
Change preposition
according to
show examples
their age, they will
better
Verb problem
do better
show examples
.
Consequently
Linking Words
, authorities can prevent
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
actions through teaching teenagers to assist
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
another
Fix the agreement mistake
other
show examples
people
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.
This
Linking Words
prevention clearly
prevent
Correct subject-verb agreement
prevents
show examples
crimes
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.
For example
Linking Words
,
according to
Linking Words
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
who work in
this
Linking Words
field
Punctuation problem
field,
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they recorded
result
Fix the agreement mistake
results
show examples
in Arabic countries have more
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
about humanitarian to teach students
respect
Verb problem
to respect
show examples
others and think more positively.
This
Linking Words
method clearly prevented
crimes
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. In conclusion, serious
criminals
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among
people
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who are under 18 are becoming more common. Some
people
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think that children should be treated as
adults
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because they believe they tend to commit
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crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
show examples
again. Meanwhile, others would say they should be rehabilitated because authorities can introduce strict laws to prevent violent
crimes
Use synonyms
among individuals who
under
Verb problem
are under
show examples
18.

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structure
Make a clear plan before you write. Write an intro, two views, your view, and a short ending.
language
Keep sentences short and use simple words. Check for grammar.
coherence
Each paragraph should have one main idea and one or two back up points.
coherence
Use link words (first, also, but, however, therefore) to help flow.
grammar
Fix small wrong forms like 'An another' and keep plural forms right.
task response
Stick to the task. Do not add ideas not in the question.
examples
Use exact examples or facts that fit the idea.
content
You show you want to speak for both sides.
structure
You end with a clear view.
content
You give your own view.
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