IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people believe that museums should return cultural artefacts to their country of origin. Others argue that it is better for these objects to be kept in international museums.

Recently, some cultural
artefacts
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 have not been returned to their original
countries
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. Some
people
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 consider that
museums
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 should return these
artefacts
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 to their original
countries
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. Others argue against
such
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 opinions. If these cultural
artefacts
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 return to their original
countries
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,
this
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 kind of behaviour will not only improve the relationship between the original country and the country which held the
artefacts
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 at
first,
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but
also
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 allow the original country to have more suitable specialists and experts to protect their
artefacts
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 in the best way.
This
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 is because they know more about their own technologies related to their
artefacts
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, and know what content should be saved when the
artefacts
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 need to be repaired.
In addition
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, the behaviour of returning
artefacts
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 can increase citizens’ sense of national pride.
However
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, it
also
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 has limitations. Some
countries
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’
museums
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 are small and have limited resources and money, which may result in the
artefacts
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 not being shown to many
people
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 around the world and decrease their
overall
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 influence. Despite the advantages of returning
artefacts
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 to their original
countries
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, showing the
artefacts
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 in international
museums
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 can present these
artefacts
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 in a better way and show them to more
people
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 worldwide, letting more
people
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 know about these
artefacts
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. In
this
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 way, it may hurt the feelings of
people
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 in the original
countries
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 and may have some negative influence on relationships between
countries
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 to some extent. All in all, from my perspective, international
museums
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 and
original
Correct article usage
the original
show examples
countries
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 can cooperate with each other. A special area can be built in international
museums
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 to display
such
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artefacts
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. The ownership should belong to the original
countries
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, and these
countries
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 can send specific specialists to protect them.The original
countries
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 should pay some money to international
museums
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 for displaying the
artefacts
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.

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task
Make your main idea clear in every part.
coherence
Link ideas with small words like and, but, also, then.
task
Add one or two real examples from a country or place.
grammar
Fix small grammar to make the reading easy.
strength
There is a wish to make both sides work with each other.
strength
The essay shows a plan for mix and share.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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