IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people point that experiential learning (i.e., learning by doing it) can work well in formal education. However, others think a traditional form of teaching is the best. Do you think experiential learning can work well in high schools or colleges?

While
Linking Words
 some
people
Use synonyms
 view experiential learning as
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
way
Use synonyms
 to learn and educate,others favour the traditional
way
Use synonyms
 of teaching and
sees
Correct subject-verb agreement
see
show examples
 it as the ultimate
way
Use synonyms
 of education. The
expiential
Correct your spelling
experiential
 learning can be very effective and efficient,
Because
Fix capitalization
because
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 it forces the
perosn
Correct your spelling
person
 into more practical
real life
Use the right word
real-life
show examples
 situations where he
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 to work his
way
Use synonyms
 out. With the change of times and the constant improvement of technology, it's hard to
relay
Use the right word
rely
show examples
 on the formal traditional teaching alone. Many
work places
Use the right word
workplaces
show examples
, different industries, require compatibility and
experinces
Correct your spelling
experiences
. The
experintial
Correct your spelling
experiential
 learning is far more efficient and practical, because
people
Use synonyms
 need experience to demonstrate their ability and skills when applying for a job and so
the
Change preposition
in the
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 industries. So many
people
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 today, having
hard
Correct article usage
a hard
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 time finding
job
Correct article usage
a job
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due to
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lack
Correct article usage
the lack
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 of experience that companies, shops
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 require from
the
Correct article usage
apply
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applicant
Fix the agreement mistake
applicants
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 to have.
For
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instance
Add a comma
instance,
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 working at a coffee shop usually exposes you to
deal
Wrong verb form
dealing
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 with
people
Use synonyms
 every day
,
Punctuation problem
.
show examples
 For
coffee
Correct article usage
a coffee
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 shop
having
Punctuation problem
, having
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 social skills matters. The formal teaching learning still not enough to keep up with the rise of compatitiveness, having phd may seem amazing and of course it,s a greate achievment, but not having enough exposure that forces you to deal with tough situations, makes it hard for both the person and the big companies,industry on the long run which obviously can lead in to having higher jobless
people
Use synonyms
 and that can affect the economy in general.
At the end
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.
Although
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experintial
Correct your spelling
experiential
 learning can be
mcuh
Correct your spelling
much
 better,especially when talking about gaining experience and knowledge that can't be
teached
Correct your spelling
taught
.
Which's
Use the right word
Which is
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 why I agree with the
experintial
Correct your spelling
experiential
 learning
due to
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 it
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 ready before taking a job.
On the other
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hand
Add a comma
hand,
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 the formal teaching alone is not enough in today's world.

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structure
Plan your essay before you write. Make a simple map with one idea for each paragraph.
task response
Open with a clear view of the topic and say your mind in one sentence.
coherence
Use one idea in each paragraph and give one tiny example for each idea.
grammar
Check spelling and make grammar clear. Use short and plain sentence.
lexicon
Keep the words in the top easy list. Do not use big words.
content
You make good key view on the topic.
example
There is a real example with work life (coffee shop).
clarity
The text is easy to read because the words are simple.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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