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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

the average number of hours each day spent on holiday in Greece

The bar chart illustrates the average number of
hours
Use synonyms
 per day that
tourists
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 from
four
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 different countries spent on
three
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 types of leisure activities
while
Linking Words
 on holiday in Greece. These activities include spending
time
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 at the
beach
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, reading books, and visiting places.
Overall
Linking Words
, there were clear differences among the nationalities in terms of how they spent their leisure
time
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. Chinese
tourists
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 preferred reading,
whereas
Linking Words
 Brazilian visitors spent the longest
time
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 at the
beach
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.
In contrast
Linking Words
, sightseeing was the least popular activity for all
four
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 groups. Among the
four
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 nationalities, Chinese
tourists
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 devoted by far the most
time
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 to reading books, averaging about eight
hours
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 per day.
However
Linking Words
, they spent only
three
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hours
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 at the
beach
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 and less than one hour visiting places. American
tourists
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 showed a more balanced pattern, with roughly six
hours
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 spent reading and around
four
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hours
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 at the
beach
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,
while
Linking Words
 they used about
three
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hours
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 for sightseeing. Turning to Turkish and Brazilian
tourists
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, both groups spent most of their
time
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 outdoors. Turkish visitors spent about six
hours
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 at the
beach
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,
four
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hours
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 reading, and
three
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hours
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 visiting different sites. Brazilians showed the opposite trend to the Chinese, dedicating around seven
hours
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 per day to the
beach
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 and only about
four
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hours
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 to reading. For both groups, visiting places took up the least amount of
time
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.

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task response
Add a clear overview at the start and a short closing line at the end.
task response
Check numbers from the chart and use exact hours when you can. Use 'about' when not sure.
coherence cohesion
Use simple link words to show flow, like and, but, also, for example.
coherence cohesion
Make two or three short paragraphs: one intro, one for each big idea, and one short finish.
strength
Clear view of main trends.
strength
Good details for each country.
strength
Reasonable structure with intro and body.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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