Ensuring that children have regular physical exercise should be the responsibility of parents and therefore school should not waste valuable time having sports as part of curriculum. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that space exploration must be investigated because of the increasing necessity for new habitats worldwide.
This
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essay totally disagrees with
this
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statement. I believe that allocating huge budgets to outer space can have detrimental impacts on Earth's ecosystem and cause more dependency on uncertain technologies. Exploring new territories for scientific purposes can worsen
significantly
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apply
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the environmental stability
.
Correct word order
significantly.
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Aspiring to acquire temporary scientific glory, a vast amount of resources must be destroyed, chopping down the budget for nature and releasing hazardous emissions into the atmosphere.
Furthermore
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, it may cause other catastrophic issues
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such
Punctuation problem
, such
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as global warming, by depriving green projects of funding and increasing ecological damage.
For example
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,
provided statistics
Correct word order
statistics provided
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by Harvard University
proves
Correct subject-verb agreement
prove
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that spending on space between 1970 and 1996, the Earth’s climate
worsened
Correct word order
apply
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by 35% by degrading the ozone layer and causing the extinction of various species. Having ignored issues
from
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on
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our planet, citizens can grow their dependency by trying to accomplish urgent necessities like finding a new home. Not only does the obsession with Mars make people eager to consume increasingly year by year, but it
also
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may lead to a neglectful approach to the current environmental crisis.
Instead
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of inventing and implementing sustainable energy solutions, humans generally rush to find a temporary salvation
in
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on
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other planets.
For instance
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, a study conducted by the World Nature Conservancy proves that
this
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mindset is gaining a tendency, with an increasing figure at about 9% each year, and causing the
neglection
Use the right word
neglect
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to
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of
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the invention of green technologies. In conclusion, though the demand for reaching other planets is growing, it mustn't be the reason to exploit our Earth, as
this
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can become a root of disaster to
the
Correct article usage
apply
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nature and reliance of humanity only on these sources.

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task
Make your view clear from the start and keep it in all you write.
content
Use true facts and simple facts. If you can't be sure, say so or skip the claim.
coherence
Link ideas with easy helpers like 'and', 'but', 'because', 'so' to make flow strong.
language
Use short, clear line. Break long sentences into two.
task
You show a clear view, and it is easy to see your mind.
coherence
There is a simple flow from start to end with a closing line.
content
You give ideas to back your view.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • overall development
  • well-being
  • access to physical activity
  • time, resources, knowledge
  • childhood obesity
  • associated health issues
  • academic performance
  • concentration, memory, behavior
  • team sports
  • life skills
  • teamwork, leadership, discipline
  • outside a school environment
  • prioritize
  • imbalance in development
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