IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Nowadays parent put too much pressure on thier cgildern to succeed. What is the reason for doing this? Is this a positive or negative development?

It’s a trend that’s hard to ignore. In 2026, the stakes for "success" feel higher than ever, and that anxiety has trickled down
into
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to
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 the family dinner table.
While
Linking Words
parents
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 usually have the best intentions—wanting their
children
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 to be "future-proof"—the methods they use often backfire. I believe
this
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 is a predominantly negative development.
While
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 a healthy "nudge" can build discipline, the current levels of extreme
pressure
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 are creating a generation
that is
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 high-achieving on paper but deeply burned out in reality. Parental
pressure
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 doesn't exist in a vacuum; it’s a response to a world that feels increasingly competitive and unpredictable. In a
globalized
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globalised
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 job market,
parents
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 fear that "average" is no longer safe. With the rise of AI and automation, many
parents
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 feel they must push their
children
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 to be elite just to ensure basic financial security. Platforms like LinkedIn and Instagram have turned achievement into a public competition.
Parents
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 see other
children
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 winning awards or landing internships and feel a "fear of falling behind" on behalf of their kids. Sometimes,
parents
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 view their
children
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 as a "second chance" to
fulfill
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fulfil
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 their own
unreached
Correct word choice
unfulfilled
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 goals. A child’s success becomes a "mental trophy" for the parent’s ego.
While
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 a certain amount of stress can improve performance (a concept known in psychology as the Yerkes-Dodson Law), the modern level of
pressure
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 has largely moved into the "distress" zone. The Negative Impacts The Irony of Underperformance
:
Punctuation problem
.
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 Ironically, constant
pressure
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 often leads to worse academic results. To put it simply, we are trading our
children
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's long-term mental health for short-term resume building. Recent studies in 2025/2026 show that "resilient"
children
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 aren't the ones who were pushed the hardest, but the ones who felt they had a secure home base to return to when they failed.

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structure
Add a short closing line to wrap up your view.
language
Use more simple link words to move from one point to the next.
content
Give a clear answer to why this is bad and add one easy example from real life.
structure
Keep ideas in small groups and use one idea per paragraph.
position
Clear stance against pressure.
logic
Good link of reason and effects.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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