IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the results of three surveys on absenteeism in a particular European country in the years 2000, 2005, and 2010.

The bar chart
ilustrates
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illustrates
 the outcomes of three surveys on
absenteism
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absenteeism
 in certain
eropea
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European
country
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countries
show examples
 in the course of 2000, 2005, and 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, there was a clear disparity between the highest and the lowest
category
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categories
show examples
.
Ilness
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Illness
recorded
Verb problem
was recorded
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 as the most
reason
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common reason
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used
Verb problem
apply
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for not going to work in all
the
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apply
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period
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periods
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 of times,
whereas
Linking Words
 family responsibilities showed a downward trend in 2005 and 2010. In detail,
ilness
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illness
 recorded the highest percentage in 2000 at just under 45% and remained the highest 10 years later, stood at just below 40% in 2005 and roughly 35% by 2010.
Linking Words
on
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On
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 the other hand, Stress had the lowest percentage
off
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of
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 all times recorded.
it
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It
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 started with a small proportion at around 6% in
2000
Punctuation problem
2000,
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then
Linking Words
 experienced a slight decline in 2005 at approximately 4%, but it
shows
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showed
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 a considerable increase by the end of the period and stood at more than 10%.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the other categories (person needs appointment,
faily
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family
, responsibilities, and unexpected problem) showed
a
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apply
show examples
sligh
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slight
 fluctuations every five years
where
Punctuation problem
, where
show examples
 they ended the period just over 15%, more than 20%, and less than 15%, respectively. - illness recorded with the highest percentage in all years - stress is the lowest

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "stood" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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