IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The pie chart shows average monthly student expenditure in the UK in 2016. The bar chart shows sources of student income in the same year. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The pie
chart
Use synonyms
 gives information about average monthly
student
Use synonyms
expenditure
Use synonyms
 in the UK in 2016,
while
Linking Words
 the bar
chart
Use synonyms
 illustrates
sources
Use synonyms
 of
student
Use synonyms
income
Use synonyms
 in the same year.
Overall
Linking Words
, the greatest monthly
student
Use synonyms
expenditure
Use synonyms
 was seen in Rent,
whereas
Linking Words
 the
figures
Use synonyms
 for Travel, Socialising, and Bills showed a small monthly
student
Use synonyms
expenditure
Use synonyms
. As for the bar
chart
Use synonyms
, the highest
sources
Use synonyms
 of
student
Use synonyms
income
Use synonyms
 were recorded in
Student
Use synonyms
 loans,
while
Linking Words
 the
figures
Use synonyms
 for Savings, Bank overdraft, and Grant and funding were
presented
Verb problem
apply
show examples
the lowest
sources
Use synonyms
 of
student
Use synonyms
income
Use synonyms
. Beginning with
pia
Correct article usage
the PIA
show examples
chart
Use synonyms
, the greatest monthly
student
Use synonyms
expenditure
Use synonyms
 was seen in Rent with 385
pounds
Use synonyms
. The
figures
Use synonyms
 for Travel, Socialising, and Bills have exhibited almost the same cost at 52, 64, and 69
pounds
Use synonyms
, respectively,
while
Linking Words
 the monthly
student
Use synonyms
expenditure
Use synonyms
 for Food and unspecified expenditures were 124
pounds
Use synonyms
 and 91
pounds
Use synonyms
, respectively. As for the bar
chart
Use synonyms
, the highest
sources
Use synonyms
 of
student
Use synonyms
income
Use synonyms
 were recorded in
Student
Use synonyms
 loans at around 82%,
while
Linking Words
 the
figures
Use synonyms
 for Savings, Bank overdraft and Grants and funding were almost the same
percent
Replace the word
percentage
show examples
 with respective around 42%, 41% and 39%. Notably, the source of
student
Use synonyms
income
Use synonyms
 in Family and Part-time
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 accounted for 65% and 64%, respectively
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
make
Correct subject-verb agreement
makes
show examples
 them
a
Correct article usage
an
show examples
avarage
Correct your spelling
average
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 compared to other
sources
Use synonyms
 of
student
Use synonyms
income
Use synonyms
.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 83%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words chart, student, expenditure, sources, income, figures, pounds with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 5 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 4 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Topic Vocabulary:
  • expenditure
  • average
  • student
  • income
  • chart
  • sources
  • accommodation
  • food
  • leisure
  • activities
  • major
  • support
  • stream
  • manage
  • expenses
  • concern
  • financial
  • challenge
  • depict
  • breakdown
  • reveal
  • contrast
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