Some people say that spending time to develop a successful career is the most important things. Others say that spending time with friends and family is more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Nowadays, some individuals believe that spending
time
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improving a future career is the most significant aspect .
However
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, others argue that spending
time
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with family members is more important. In my opinion,
people
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have to keep a
balance
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. On the one hand,
people
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try to earn a lot of money for a comfortable life. That's why many young
people
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work
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so much.
For example
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, Americans
work
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12 hours a day to earn a high salary.
As a result
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, the majority of rich
people
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live in the USA.
On the other hand
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, some inhabitants prefer to spend
time
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with family and friends. Spending quality
time
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with family members improves mental health. Most of the nation values these warm moments.
For instance
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, many Uzbek individuals appreciate being together, especially cooking palov, eating palov together. In my opinion , keeping a
balance
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is the best solution. It helps achieve harmony between
work
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and family. If
people
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spend
time
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only with family, they cannot earn much money.
As a result
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, it leads to their unhappiness .
However
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, if young
people
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work
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a lot, they can lose warmth and love between family and friends. That's why keeping a
work
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-life
balance
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is crucial.
For instance
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, many Korean
people
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try to keep a
balance
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. They strive to
work
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5-6 hours in day and find good
work
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with a high salary. It really improves their lives. In conclusion, some inhabitants believe that spending
time
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developing a prosperous career with a high salary is the most important thing, but others claim that spending
time
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meaningfully with loved ones and friends is more significant. In my opinion,
people
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should maintain a
balance
Use synonyms

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improvement
Plan your essay: state your view in the first paragraph and keep to two main ideas.
improvement
Link ideas with simple words like and, but, also, then to show how points fit.
improvement
Use one clear example for each point and keep it short and on topic.
strength
You show a clear view that balance is best.
strength
Some good ideas on both sides.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
Topic Vocabulary:
  • career
  • family
  • friends
  • time
  • work
  • life
  • job
  • money
  • happy
  • sad
  • plan
  • balance
  • choice
  • view
  • opinion
  • reason
  • example
  • learn
  • growth
  • skill
  • success
  • goal
  • support
  • stress
  • health
  • together
  • relax
  • enjoy
  • limit
  • schedule
  • boundary
  • future
  • care
  • value
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