The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010.

The given graph demonstrates
expenses
Correct article usage
the expenses
show examples
of two distinct countries on buyer mercenaries in 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
the
UK
Use synonyms
spend a lot of
money
Use synonyms
given period. British and
France
Use synonyms
used
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
most
money
Use synonyms
on
Cars
Correct article usage
the Cars
show examples
sector,
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
indicator was witnessed on Perfume field. In terms of cars, people used up 450,000
pounds
Use synonyms
in the
UK
Use synonyms
, but
this
Linking Words
index
is
Wrong verb form
amounts
show examples
amounted
Change preposition
amounted to
show examples
400,000
pounds
Use synonyms
for
France
Use synonyms
. In
Books
Correct article usage
the Books
show examples
section British used up 400,000
pounds
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
indicator
Correct article usage
The indicator
show examples
was 300,000
pounds
Use synonyms
for
France
Use synonyms
. İt seems that the
France
Use synonyms
population was not interested in
spening
Correct your spelling
spending
money
Use synonyms
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
Cameras
Punctuation problem
Cameras,
show examples
this
Linking Words
index accounted for
lowest
Correct article usage
the lowest
show examples
figure for all categories with 150,000
pounds
Use synonyms
, but
this
Linking Words
figure was doubled for the
UK
Use synonyms
percentage. Regarding
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
number
Check wording
amount
show examples
of
money
Use synonyms
for
France
Use synonyms
reached 380,000
pounds
Use synonyms
in Computer, and
this
Linking Words
proportion was 350,000
pounds
Use synonyms
in the
UK
Use synonyms
. The lowest indicator was experienced in
Perfume
Correct article usage
the Perfume
show examples
sector for both
France
Use synonyms
and the
UK
Use synonyms
countries
Check wording
apply
show examples
. Expenditure on perfume stood at 200,000

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
Introduction: The introduction is missing.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the sixth paragraph.
Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
Vocabulary: Replace the words uk, money, france, pounds with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "figure" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the sixth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • expenditure
  • consumer goods
  • chart
  • countries
  • overall
  • compare
  • analyze
  • categories
  • consumer spending
  • trends
  • proportions
  • statistics
  • increase
  • decrease
  • significant
  • notable
  • remarkable
  • substantial
  • considerable
  • determine
  • conclude
  • in conclusion
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