***Some people believe that teaching children at home is best for a child's development while others think that it is important for children to go to school.*** ***Discuss the advantages of both methods and give your own opinion.***

There have been debates on whether educating
children
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at home or at
school
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is better for
the
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their
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overall
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development
of
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apply
show examples
them
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apply
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.
However
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, I firmly believe that the best option for
the
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apply
show examples
ultimate education is attending schools. On the one hand , homeschooling offers a wide range of beneficial perks. First of all ,
children
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can learn at their own pace
,
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;
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therefore
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, not over-pressuring them.
As a result
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, they
rarely
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are rarely
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unable to keep up with the lesson ,thereby
,
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apply
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increasing the academic performances.
Secondly
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,
this
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style of teaching allows
students
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to adjust their schedule freely without worrying about skipping
lesson
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a lesson
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.
Last
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but not least, homeschooling is deeply linked to the involvement of the entire family.
This
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means a quiet ,safe studying
enviroment
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environment
and studying content
that is
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speacially
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specially
tailored to
child's
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the child's
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interests.
For example
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,
In
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in
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Japan, a study suggests that individuals who are taught at home perform better than their peers when it comes to realistic and practical tasks.
On the other hand
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, the traditional
school
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life
enable
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enables
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children
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to develop many other important skills that will follow
student
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students
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until they
are graduated
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graduate
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.
To begin
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with,
school
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helps to develop
the
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apply
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teamwork skills
as well as
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social life.
This
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is because sometimes
students
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are required to work together as a team to gain
grade
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a grade
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and
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, and
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peers
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peer
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pressure
help
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helps
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in boosting the score.
In addition
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,
children
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are regularly exposed to
revelant
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relevant
subjects ,
school
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regulations and
well trained
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well-trained
show examples
teachers.These are the
foundation
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foundations
show examples
for their future jobs.
For instance
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, science or social subjects -
such
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as literature and math - are
well-organized
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well-organised
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so as to help
students
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collect fundamental knowledge which is highly demanded in their dream jobs. In conclusion, both sides some some truth, yet participating in schools delivers substantial benefits
which
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, which
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are about
encourage
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encouraging
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students
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' engagement and trustworthy, advanced knowledge, regardless of practical experience from home education.

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task response
Your task response needs to show clear and full ideas. Explain why each point matters and give a stronger, simpler view for your own stance. Include a brief but clear conclusion that restates your view.
coherence
Improve link and flow. Use topic sentences for each paragraph and simple connect words (and, but, so, because, also). Keep sentences short and avoid long runs.
task response
You discuss both sides and give your view.
coherence
Some parts are easy to read with clear intent.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • home
  • school
  • child
  • learn
  • teach
  • pace
  • flexible
  • routine
  • safe
  • family
  • interest
  • one to one
  • teacher
  • peer
  • social
  • skills
  • teamwork
  • friends
  • class
  • lesson
  • plan
  • choice
  • option
  • balance
  • mix
  • opinion
  • conclusion
  • advantage
  • benefit
  • disadvantage
  • problem
  • drawback
  • progress
  • goal
  • support
  • resource
  • time
  • discipline
  • communication
  • opportunity
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