IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

These days more and more young people are studying in foreign countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages of studying abroad?

In recent years, lots of youngsters prefer to
study
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 abroad.
Although
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study
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studying
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 abroad offers many advantages, its disadvantages should not be neglected. One of the most significant advantages of
Use synonyms
study
Replace the word
studying
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 abroad is a better education system than
local
Correct article usage
the local
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 one. If young people
study
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 in foreign developed
countries
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, they can access high-quality
of
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apply
show examples
education and advanced academic resources.
In addition
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, people who are studying in foreign
countries
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 can travel at the same time
with
Change preposition
as
show examples
 their studies. Another benefit of studying abroad is
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
strong networking with
students
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 who
came
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come
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 from different walks of life.
As a result
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, they can broaden their horizons by sharing ideas and studies with other
foreigner
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foreign
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students
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.
On the other hand
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, there are several drawbacks
studying
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to studying
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 abroad
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such
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, such
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 as homesickness, financial problems, and cultural shock. When
students
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study
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 in different
countries
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 far away from their home and family members, they feel more isolated, which can lead to stress and homesickness. What's more, they might struggle with financial issues
and
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, and
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 adaptation might be challenging
due to
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 culture shock.
For example
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, tuition fees, accommodation, and living expenses are so high in foreign
countries
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.
Therefore
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, these disadvantages negatively affect their mental health and academic
performances
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performance
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. In conclusion,
while
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 studying abroad provides valuable educational, personal, and professional benefits, it
also
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 involves financial and emotional challenges.
Thus
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,
students
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 should carefully weigh both the advantages and disadvantages before making
this
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 important decision.

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grammar
Fix grammar in small jumps. Use 'a' before countable noun and 'the' before clear thing.
coherence
Make ideas fit in a safe order. Tell first the main point, then the reason, then a tiny example.
lexical
Use plain words. Some words are not from the top 100 list. Like 'networking' or 'cultural' should be swapped.
examples
Give one short example for each idea to show it in real life.
style
Keep a calm and clean tone. Do not repeat the same word many times.
content
The essay covers both sides of the issue.
structure
Clear ending that restates the view.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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