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Writing Samples
Band 4

Childcare training courses should be mandatory for all parents. Agree or disagree?

It is argued that a large number of parents should necessarily educate themselves in infant care educational programs. I am in
the
Correct article usage
apply
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favor
Change the spelling
favour
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 of
this
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 idea as parents need to equip themselves with enhanced knowledge, which is an absolute must, to better raise their offspring. To
initiate
Verb problem
begin
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 with, these exercises are crucial, since they will motivate caregivers in understanding the personality of the youngster. As the toddlers cannot convey their understanding well,
such
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 task-based learning can facilitate the elders to comprehend their needs, so they can serve them
accordingly
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;
for instance
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, sometimes the child might exhibit
an
Correct article usage
apply
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erratic
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour
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, especially in the teething process.
Hence
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,
such
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 studies prove useful.
That is
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 to say, the elders can use the acquired skill
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 and curb the situation.
Secondly
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, these sessions would help the
grownups
Use the right word
grown-ups
show examples
 in guiding the young members of the society. If
this
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 guidance works well, it will boost their
self- esteem
Use the right word
self-esteem
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,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 and contribute towards their holistic development.
In other words
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, the children will not only be in a better position to cope with societal pressures, but
also
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 tackle conflicts in everyday life;
for example
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, a child subjected to bullying would develop the confidence to ward off
further
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 attempts in the future by using
his
Correct pronoun usage
their
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 problem-solving skills.
To conclude
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,
despite
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although
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 a number of mothers and fathers might find these courses irrelevant. I strongly believe they are beneficial for both the children and their parents, as they will promote a healthy relationship between them.

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grammar
Use simple words and very clear heads. Fix small errors in grammar and form. This will make your point more clear.
coherence
Keep a steady plan. Use a line for your idea, then an example, then a short ending for the idea. It helps the reader follow.
task
Be sure to answer the task: state your view in one line at the start and restate it at the end. Do not drift from this view.
coherence
Avoid phrases that sound off in form, such as 'To initiate with'. Choose plain words like 'First' or 'First of all' to begin paragraphs.
content
Add more exact examples that fit the idea well. Say how training can help in daily life, not only in hard cases.
strength
Clear stance toward the topic.
strength
Reasoning is logical and uses examples.
strength
Paragraphs have a good flow and message is easy to read.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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