IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart illustrate the three cumputer packages were downloaded through internet at different times in per week (from week1 to week5).

The bar graph gives the information for three apps that were downloaded
by
Change preposition
from
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 the internet from
week
Use synonyms
 1 to
week
Use synonyms
 5. Units are measured in numbers.
Overall
Linking Words
, ActiveX experienced the highest package installation,
while
Linking Words
 Java was the second
tallest
Correct word choice
highest
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 package, but
Net
Check wording
.NET
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 saw the lowest trend throughout the period. In the first
week
Use synonyms
, ActiveX began at 77
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 it rose
steadily
Punctuation problem
steadily,
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reached
Wrong verb form
reaching
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 around 90 in the third
week
Use synonyms
,
whereas
Linking Words
 Java started
42
Change preposition
at 42
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Linking Words
Punctuation problem
; also
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also it
Correct word order
it also
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 experienced a slow climb
about
Change preposition
to about
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 48 and
it
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 was like second
week
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
,
Net
Check wording
the number
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 downloaded
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 at 38, and in the third
week
Use synonyms
 it fell
at
Change preposition
to
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 13%, but the
consumers were
Check wording
number
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 downloaded
18
Verb problem
was 18
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 in the second
week
Use synonyms
. In
week
Use synonyms
 4, the ActiveX went up minimally
about
Change preposition
by about
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 110
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 it
peak
Wrong verb form
peaked
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 at 120
in
Change preposition
at
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 the end of the period, and Java rose slightly
around
Change preposition
by around
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 42
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 it showed a slow increase in
week
Use synonyms
 five. The net
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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saw a slight growth
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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 it went up for
few
Correct article usage
a few
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 downloaders.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words week with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "went up" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slow" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slightly" was used 2 times.
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