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Writing Samples
Band 5

In today’s very competitive world, a worker has to possess multiple skills to succeed.] Among the skills that a worker should possess, which skill do you think is more important, social skills or good qualifications?

In today's highly competitive world, it is imperative for
individuals
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 to possess a multitude of
skills
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 in order to succeed. Among the
skills
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 that a worker should possess, I firmly believe that good qualifications hold greater significance than social
skills
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.
While
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both
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 are crucial, I argue that
education
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 plays a pivotal role in one's life, enabling
individuals
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 to attain their goals and realise their full potential.
Although
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education
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 can
also
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 facilitate the improvement of
skills
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 through various means,
such
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 as social media applications and teacher support, it is the primary factor that allows
individuals
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 to analyse and enhance their
talents
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.
For instance
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, many influencers utilise social media platforms, like graphic designers who employ the CANVA app to refine their graphic
skills
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.
Similarly
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, students can enrol in courses to address their queries under the guidance of teachers.
On the other hand
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, social
skills
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also
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 have a profound impact on
individuals
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, enabling them to enhance their communication and develop their
talents
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.
However
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, it is undeniable that skilled
individuals
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 are often successful
due to
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 their extensive exposure and ability to leverage their innovations to attract consumers.
For example
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, extroverted
individuals
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 tend to excel in marketing,
whereas
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 introverted
individuals
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 may struggle in
this
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 field.
Furthermore
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, it is evident that
both
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 factors like graphic designers who employ the CANVA app to refine their graphic
skills
Use synonyms
.
Similarly
Linking Words
, students can enrol in courses to address their queries under the guidance of teachers.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, social
skills
Use synonyms
also
Linking Words
 have a profound impact on
individuals
Use synonyms
, enabling them to enhance their communication and develop their
talents
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, it is undeniable that skilled
individuals
Use synonyms
 are often successful
due to
Linking Words
 their extensive exposure and ability to leverage their innovations to attract consumers.
For example
Linking Words
, extroverted
individuals
Use synonyms
 tend to excel in marketing,
whereas
Linking Words
 introverted
individuals
Use synonyms
 may struggle in
this
Linking Words
 field.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, it is evident that
both
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 factors have a direct impact on one's life activities, but in my opinion,
education
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 holds greater importance than social
skills
Use synonyms
.
This
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 is because without knowledge and information,
individuals
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 are unable to channel their innovative initiatives in the right direction.
Similarly
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, illiterate
individuals
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 lack awareness of how to utilise and analyse their
talents
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, despite possessing some knowledge and information.
This
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 comparison highlights that the benefits of
education
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 outweigh the advantages of social
skills
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. In conclusion,
individuals
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 should strive to strike a balance between
both
Use synonyms
 aspects of life, fostering their future growth and ensuring their success as
individuals
Use synonyms
.

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task
Make the main idea clear in the intro in one line and restate it at the end.
coherence
Use linking words to connect ideas in a simple way.
examples
Give one strong example per point and explain how it shows the skill.
editing
Avoid repeating phrases; check the text to remove repeated sentences.
strength
The writer shows a clear view that education matters most.
strength
The essay uses everyday examples the reader can relate to.
strength
The ending says we should balance skills.
Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • networking
  • relationship-building
  • effective communication
  • teamwork
  • collaboration
  • productivity
  • job satisfaction
  • technical expertise
  • prerequisite
  • essential knowledge
  • problem-solving skills
  • leadership
  • negotiation
  • managing teams
  • resolving conflicts
  • motivating
  • adaptability
  • diverse cultural settings
  • resilient
  • career advancement
  • specialized roles
  • advanced degrees
  • certifications
  • competitive edge
  • job market
  • technical know-how
  • interact effectively
  • colleagues
  • clients
  • superiors
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