IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people believe that testing products on animals should be banned but others think that this is necessary. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some would argue that trying products on
animals
Use synonyms
 before humans should be banned,
while
Linking Words
 others think it is necessary to test on
animals
Use synonyms
 first.
Although
Linking Words
 testing on
animes
Use the right word
animals
show examples
 is cruel since
animals
Use synonyms
feels
Correct subject-verb agreement
feel
show examples
pain
Use synonyms
 as
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
show examples
 do, I believe that products must be tested on wildlife first because human life
worth
Verb problem
is worth
show examples
 more and bad products would result in
damages
Fix the agreement mistake
damage
show examples
 to a
Use synonyms
company
Check wording
company's
show examples
 image. On the one hand, animal testing is cruel because it
feels
Correct subject-verb agreement
feel
show examples
pain
Use synonyms
 as humans do.
Animals
Use synonyms
wonder
Verb problem
live
show examples
 their life in the wild
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 their brain does not think of the idea of
headac
Correct your spelling
headache
 and noise
pleed
Correct your spelling
pollution
. In
islamic
Fix capitalization
Islamic
show examples
 culture
Use synonyms
animals
Punctuation problem
, animals
show examples
 must not be killed in front of
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
show examples
 kind
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
must
Correct word order
apply
show examples
the way of killing
be
Correct word order
must be
show examples
mercyfull
Correct your spelling
merciful
 to the animal.
However
Linking Words
,
Animals
Use synonyms
 do not have a way to speak up for
its
Fix the agreement mistake
their
show examples
 rights
even
Punctuation problem
, even
show examples
 though the
pain
Use synonyms
 no one could handle.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
Use synonyms
company's
Correct article usage
a company's
show examples
 public image has most of its value
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 bad word of mouth would spread like
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
wild fire
Use the right word
wildfire
show examples
.
By testing
Change preposition
Testing
show examples
 on
animals
Use synonyms
 first is a way to safe
garud
Check wording
guard for
show examples
 a
company
Use synonyms
 in the eyes of the public.
For example
Linking Words
,
An
Fix capitalization
an
show examples
Use synonyms
animals right
Fix the agreement mistake
animal rights
show examples
 society once made a
company
Use synonyms
 test on
childern
Correct your spelling
children
 for their new product
which
Punctuation problem
, which
show examples
 resulted in 98
percent
Change the spelling
per cent
show examples
 of the children on the test
to die
Wrong verb form
dying
show examples
. I believe the
companies
Check wording
company's
show examples
 public image and human well-being
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 worth more than an
animle
Correct your spelling
animal
 that can not talk or think.
To conclude
Linking Words
, making
animals
Use synonyms
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
feel
pain
Use synonyms
 is harmful,
But
Fix capitalization
but
show examples
 human life is priceless
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 companies must
prodect
Correct your spelling
protect
its self
Check wording
themselves
show examples
ftom
Correct your spelling
from
 losing
people
Check wording
people's
show examples
 trust.

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structure
Make a clear plan before you write. Say your view, then add 1 or 2 main ideas, and end with a short wrap up.
examples
Use real and simple examples that fit the task, and keep them easy to check.
grammar
Check your grammar and spell common words like 'animals', 'pain', and 'company' in the right form.
cohesion
Link ideas with easy join words such as 'also', 'but', and 'so' to show how ideas go together.
credibility
Avoid wrong facts or far ideas. Say what you can prove in the text, and keep to what you say.
tone
Keep the tone calm and clear. Do not go far or hard in words.
strength
The writer states a view clearly.
strength
The essay tries to show both sides and to give an opinion.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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