In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

Nowadays,
crime
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rates are increasing in many countries around the world.
This
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essay will discuss the main causes of
this
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issue and suggest possible solutions to address it. One of the main causes of
crime
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is unemployment.
This
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happens because many young
people
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, who can’t find stable employment after finishing school, are turning to illegal activities
,
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apply
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in order to support themselves financially.
For instance
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, in many urban areas, young
people
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who cannot find work often join gangs, leading to increased street
crime
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. Another significant factor is
drug
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abuse. It is a common phenomenon that individuals who are
drug
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addicts become involved in
drug
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trafficking. Both of those causes have dramatic consequences, often leading to a permanent criminal record and making it extremely difficult to reintegrate into society. To tackle these issues, governments should create
programs
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related to job placement and career development. These
programs
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could include vocational training, internships, and partnerships with private companies to provide young
people
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and unemployed adults with practical skills and real work experience. By doing
this
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, more individuals will have access to sustainable jobs
and
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, and
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as a result
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, they will no longer be forced into
legal
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illegal
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activities.
Additionally
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, governments should develop specialised
programs
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for individuals struggling with
drug
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addiction, offering not only medical treatment but
also
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social support and education. These
programs
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can help former addicts rebuild their lives and become productive members of society. In conclusion,
crime
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is mainly caused by unemployment and
drug
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addiction.
However
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, with proper measures
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such
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, such
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as the development of several
programs
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to help those
people
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,
this
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problem can be effectively reduced.

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task response
Task response: The essay gives a clear view on the causes of crime and some good solutions. It keeps to the main point and states your stance in the first paragraph and again in the conclusion. However, to be stronger, add more detail on how each solution will work and give more examples or data.
coherence
Coherence and cohesion: The essay has a logical order with introduction, body, and conclusion. Each paragraph has one main idea. Use better topic sentences at the start of each paragraph and use linking words to show why one idea leads to another.
structure
Clear plan with intro, body, and conclusion
content
Main points kept in each paragraph
examples
Some examples used to show points
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic disparity
  • propensity
  • recidivism
  • deterrent
  • rehabilitative
  • judicial system
  • corruption
  • socioeconomic
  • alienation
  • stigmatization
  • decriminalization
  • enforcement
  • gentrification
  • preemptive measures
  • intervention strategies
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