IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

To what extent is advertising beneficial or harmful to society?

Advertising is often viewed as a double-edged sword
due to
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 its mixed impact on society. On the one hand, it enhances brand awareness, expands consumer choice, and stimulates market competition, which can lead to economic growth.
On the other hand
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, modern advertising frequently fuels consumerism and encourages impulse buying by appealing to emotions rather than reason.
Furthermore
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, intrusive advertising can bombard people with messages, resulting in information overload and concerns about privacy invasion. Some companies even cross the line by exploiting insecurities and promoting unrealistic beauty standards, which can distort priorities among young people.
Consequently
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,
although
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 advertising can be justified as a tool for economic development, its ethical implications remain highly questionable.

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development
Add clear examples to back up each main point. This will make your case more strong.
coherence
Use more simple links to connect ideas. Words like also, however, for example help guide the reader.
vocabulary
Keep the word choice simple. Some big words may make your meaning less clear.
task response
State your view in the first part and end with a clear end that repeats it.
content
The essay shows both good and bad sides of ads and gives a closing line.
coherence
Good use of clear links at times to show contrast.
structure
The plan is clear with an intro, body parts, and a final line.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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