The chart below shows the expenditure of two countries on consumer goods in 2010

The chart illustrates
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
the
cost
Use synonyms
of the
UK
Use synonyms
and
France
Use synonyms
on consumer cargos in 2010. In the
UK
Use synonyms
, the
expendence
Correct your spelling
expenditure
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
cameras was the lowest
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
the five different goods. At the same time, the
cost
Use synonyms
of the perfume in
France
Use synonyms
was the lowest
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
. In 2010, the
cost
Use synonyms
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
carsin
Correct your spelling
cars in
the
UK
Use synonyms
was the largest
one
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
in
Change preposition
among
show examples
the five
various
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
goods,
which reached
Wrong verb form
reaching
show examples
4500000 and was much
high
Correct word choice
higher
show examples
than that in
France
Use synonyms
(400000). The books are
also
Linking Words
popular in the
UK
Use synonyms
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
the
expendence
Correct your spelling
expenditure
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
them reached 410000, which was higher than that of the books in
France
Use synonyms
. At the same time, the expense of the cameras in the
UK
Use synonyms
(350000) was about three times
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
that in
France
Use synonyms
(150000). At the same time, the
expendence
Correct your spelling
expenditure
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
computers in the
UK
Use synonyms
reached 35000, which was similar to the
cost
Use synonyms
of the cameras and was lower than that in
France
Use synonyms
(370000). The
cost
Use synonyms
of the perfumes in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
France
Use synonyms
reached
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
200000
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
it was much higher than that in the
UK
Use synonyms
(140000).

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
Linking words: Add more linking words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Replace the words cost, uk, france with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 4 times.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • expenditure
  • consumer goods
  • chart
  • countries
  • overall
  • compare
  • analyze
  • categories
  • consumer spending
  • trends
  • proportions
  • statistics
  • increase
  • decrease
  • significant
  • notable
  • remarkable
  • substantial
  • considerable
  • determine
  • conclude
  • in conclusion
What to do next:
Look at other essays: