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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Why Bicycles Are a Better Option Than Cars for City Travel

In today's day and age, more and more
people
Use synonyms
 argue that in a city, the best way to
travel
Use synonyms
 is by
car
Use synonyms
,
while
Linking Words
other
Fix the agreement mistake
others
show examples
Use synonyms
people
Check wording
apply
show examples
believe that bicycles are a better way of
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 in big
cities
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. Personally, I believe that bicycles are better
to
Change preposition
for travelling
show examples
travel
Use synonyms
 and
enjoy
Wrong verb form
enjoying
show examples
 the natural view. Admittedly, if
people
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
cities
Change preposition
between cities
show examples
 by
car
Use synonyms
, they can see more places
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
even they can
Correct word order
they can even
show examples
 reach their destination more easily without any effort compared with a
bicycle
Use synonyms
.
Also
Linking Words
, with a
car
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
people
Punctuation problem
, people
show examples
 can go
further
Linking Words
 places
like
Punctuation problem
, like
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 other countries or
cities
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for
Punctuation problem
, for
show examples
 these
reasons
Punctuation problem
reasons,
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 more and more
people
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
 by
car
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
, if everyone
have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
show examples
 their own
car
Use synonyms
, they can
travel
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 anywhere without waiting or delays
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 that most
people
Use synonyms
 are fond of
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 by
car
Use synonyms
. After all, with
that
Correct determiner usage
those
show examples
 benefits, there are some drawbacks
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
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 as
a
Correct article usage
apply
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cars might increase the level of CO2 (carbon dioxide)
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
this
Linking Words
 is very huge problem in today's world.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
with
Change preposition
by
show examples
bicycle
Use synonyms
, they can see a few places but can enjoy
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
nature. It is true that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 there are some drawbacks
like
Punctuation problem
, like
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 can reach their destination in several hours
or
Punctuation problem
, or
show examples
 some
people
Use synonyms
 do not know how to ride
Use synonyms
bicycle
Correct article usage
a bicycle
show examples
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 there are a lot of benefits
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 when
people
Use synonyms
travel
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 by bike.
For example
Linking Words
,
people
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 can
be fit
Correct word order
also be fit
show examples
also
Linking Words
,
Punctuation problem
;
show examples
 they can build muscle and so on.
In addition
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
travel
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
cities
Change preposition
between cities
show examples
 or countries by bike, they can reduce carbon dioxide in the air
unlike
Punctuation problem
, unlike
show examples
 cars
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
also
Linking Words
, there will be
less
Fix the agreement mistake
fewer
show examples
 traffic jams on the streets. In conclusion, by
bicycle
Use synonyms
Use synonyms
people
Punctuation problem
, people
show examples
 can face some challenging works like delays or
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 less
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
 they can enjoy
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
 view
as well as
Linking Words
 nature
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
 that more and more
people
Use synonyms
 prefer
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
 by bike.

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structure
Make a clear plan for each paragraph: a topic sentence, one main idea, and a link to your view.
grammar
Use easy words and fix small grammar mistakes: for example, use 'everyone has' and check 'cars' and 'bike' sentences.
content
Give a strong reason with a small example about city travel, like how bikes save time in busy streets or how cars use more space.
content
The writer states a view clearly.
structure
There are some links between ideas to move from one point to the next.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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