More and more young people from wealthy countries are spending time in communities in poorer countries doing unpaid work such as teaching or building houses. Why is this? Who benefits more from this, the communities or these young people?

It is true that an increasing number of young
people
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from wealthy countries are spending time in poorer
communities
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doing unpaid work,
such
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as teaching or building houses.
This
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essay will discuss the main reasons for
this
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trend and argue that,
although
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local
communities
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benefit, young volunteers often gain even more from the experience. The primary reason why young
people
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choose to volunteer abroad is the desire for personal development and new experiences. Many young adults want to travel, explore different cultures and step outside their comfort zones.
In addition
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, volunteering can improve their CVs and increase their chances of finding a good job in the future.
For example
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, working in challenging conditions helps them develop independence, communication skills, and problem-solving abilities. Another reason is the growing awareness of global inequality, which encourages young
people
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to contribute to meaningful causes.
As a result
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, volunteering abroad is often seen as both an adventure and an opportunity for self-improvement. Turning to the question of who benefits more, it could be argued that both sides gain advantages
,
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;
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however
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, young volunteers may benefit to a greater extent.
While
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local
communities
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receive help,
such
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as new buildings or educational support, these projects are often temporary.
In contrast
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, young adults gain long-term benefits, including valuable life experience, cultural understanding and stronger career prospects. The impact on their personal growth can
last
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for many years.
Therefore
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,
although
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communities
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do receive assistance, the participants often experience more significant and lasting advantages. In conclusion, young
people
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volunteer abroad mainly for personal growth and career opportunities and despite the support provided to poorer
communities
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, the volunteers themselves usually benefit more in the long term.

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task response
Make your view in the opening more clear and keep it to the end.
evidence
Give more real examples to back your points.
coherence
Use clearer links to move from one idea to the next.
language
Keep sentences short and easy to read.
structure
Start each paragraph with a clear idea (topic sentence).
strength
The essay has a clear main idea.
strength
Intro and conclusion are present.
strength
Good use of linking words.
Your opinion

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