IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some people believe that children should not be given homework every day , while others belive that they must get homework everyday in order to be succesful at school.Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

It is a common opinion that teachers should not give
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assigment
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assignments
 to students on
everyday
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an everyday
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 basis
but
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, but
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 an
oposit
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opposite
 point
exist
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exists
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 that regular
homework
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lead
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leads
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 to higher school performance.
This
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 essay will discuss both
opinion
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opinions
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 before presenting my own. On the one hand,
Homework
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 is always based on the material learned in class.So making an
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assignment
assigment
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 helps to revise
a
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the
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material
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material,
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 what cause better
memorizing
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memorisation
 and
a
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the
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 creation of profound and structural
knowledges
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knowledge
show examples
.
Moreover
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,it can help to find weak spots and
gapes
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gaps
 in
a
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an
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 understanding of material.
Student
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Students
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 can directly see which tasks are easy for them and which
one
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ones
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 induce troubles so they can focus on
particular
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a particular
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 area or ask teachers for a better explanation.
Furhermore
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Furthermore
,it
emrace
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embraces
 the discipline.
Studens
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Students
 know if they
dont
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don't
 complete
it
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it,
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 they will have a demerit or worse marks.
On the other hand
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, a
big
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large
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 amount of
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assigment
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assignments
 may create a
time
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deficete
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deficit
 for other activities.When students are
bussy
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busy
 with
homework
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almost
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, almost
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 all their free
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time
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time,
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 they may lack
a
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apply
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time
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 for hanging out with friends,
sport
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sports
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 activities or
personall hobbyes
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personal hobbies
.Despite the fact that academic knowledges are very important others aspects
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such
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, such
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 as
an
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apply
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physical activity,social skills
and
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, and
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 enough
amount of
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apply
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sleep
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sleep,
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 have the same influence on
a
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the
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 well-rounded
developing
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development
 of minors.
Hence
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 student may feel stress because of imposibility to
fulfill
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fulfil
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 their needs and start to
sacrafice
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sacrifice
 sleep
time
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.
This
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 fact has very
harmfull consequenses
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harmful consequences
 for
healt especialy
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health, especially
 during young age. In my opinion
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,
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an
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assigment
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assignment
 should be given on
constant
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a constant
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 basis but has to be strictly limited to not
ocuppae
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occupy
 all leisure and
left
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leave
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time
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 for
persnoal
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personal
 needs. In
conlusion
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conclusion
,school
homework
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 has more
benifits
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benefits
 because it
create
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creates
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 advanced and sophisticated
knowledges
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knowledge
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 and
foster
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fosters
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 discipline what will help in future life.

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task response
Answer both sides in a more even way. The first side is clear, but the second side needs a bit more support.
task response
Give one or two short real examples to make your ideas stronger.
task response
Make your opinion very clear in the end and keep it the same through the essay.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end, which is good.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words more carefully. Some ideas jump too fast from one point to the next.
coherence and cohesion
Develop each main point more fully before moving to the next one.
task response
You discuss both views and give your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion are present.
coherence and cohesion
The essay is split into clear paragraphs.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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