It is inevitable that technology development may lead traditional culture to be lost

Most people think that depelopement of automation may affect traditional culture in a negative way.

However

Linking Words

, machinery can be used as a tool for preserving cultural values , whether it is materialistic or non-materialistic. I personally disagree with

this

Linking Words

statement that computers and tradition are incompatible. In my opinion, the development of mechanics saved an abundance of traditions from disappearing permanently.

For instance

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, weaving carpets was in danger of disappearing in rural places in my country.

This

Linking Words

job required a significant amount of energy, time, and physical strength, which must

last

Linking Words

for several hours a day, which led most women to stop working in

this

Linking Words

area.

Although

Linking Words

implementing the computers in

this

Linking Words

area made weaving carpet easier and saved physical efforts by humans. One more example, most world languages were not demolished, because they are saved in computer memories or published as books , or at least were recorded with the help of electronic components. In conclusion, robotics and traditional culture are not in danger of each other.

kumushkangeo

Mar 19, 2026

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task response

Make your main idea more clear from the start. Say exactly why you disagree.

task response

Add one more clear and full example to support your view better.

task response

Explain your ideas more fully. Some points are good, but they are too short.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words more carefully, like 'first', 'for example', and 'as a result'.

coherence and cohesion

Make each paragraph have one main idea only. This will make your essay easier to follow.

coherence and cohesion

Check sentence order and grammar, because some parts are hard to understand.

task response

You clearly give your opinion in the essay.

task response

You use examples about carpet making and language saving.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, body, and conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

There is a clear topic in each body paragraph.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

168 words

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It is inevitable that technology development may lead traditional culture to be lost

Society is based on rules and laws. It could not function if individuals were free to do whatever they wanted. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Financial education should be included as a mandatory subject in schoolto prepare students for managing money effectively. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Many people try to achieve success through their career or education. What can success mean to different people? What is your view of success?

Some people believe that children should start school as early as possible, while others believe that children should begin school when they are at least 7 years old. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

These days it is much easier for many people to travel to different countries for tourism than in the past. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?