In today's competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents to go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parent's absence. Discussion

There is no doubt that these days

parents

Use synonyms

found that

both

Use synonyms

of them working is better for their kids income,

while

Linking Words

the other feel that their children will have a lack of the emotinal

support

Use synonyms

Linking Words

this

Fix capitalization

This

show examples

essay will discuss

both

Use synonyms

point

Fix the agreement mistake

points

show examples

of view. In terms of advantages of

employede

Correct your spelling

employed

parents

Use synonyms

, the main reason given to

support

Use synonyms

this

Linking Words

claim is that

Use synonyms

thier

Correct your spelling

their

career and education pathway

wiyll

Correct your spelling

will

be strong and easy.

Fix capitalization

show examples

illustrate, career

parents

Use synonyms

have a good amount of money to

support

Use synonyms

thier

Correct your spelling

their

sons and

doughter

Correct your spelling

daughters

with a highly

education

Replace the word

educated

school and

universit

Correct your spelling

university

to have

Use synonyms

thier

Correct your spelling

their

strong

carrer

Correct your spelling

career

pathway that they love and choose.

Moreover

Linking Words

, as a whole

family

Add a comma

family,

show examples

they can invest their money

with

Change preposition

show examples

the

thing

Check wording

things

show examples

they love to do to have a quality time

togather

Correct your spelling

together

However

Linking Words

, othe thinks that

both

Use synonyms

of them working will affect

Use synonyms

thier

Correct your spelling

their

babies emotionally.

This

Linking Words

is because

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

missing

both

Use synonyms

of them will make them feel the

ansence

Correct your spelling

absence

Use synonyms

thier

Correct your spelling

their

roles in

Use synonyms

thier

Correct your spelling

their

life. In

conclusions

Check wording

conclusion

show examples

although

Linking Words

sme families

support

Use synonyms

the working mother and father, others feel that it will affect

Use synonyms

thier

Correct your spelling

their

kids life

Check wording

kids' lives

show examples

. I believe that quality time is about being there for your kids

psycholically

Correct your spelling

psychologically

emotionally

Punctuation problem

emotionally,

show examples

when they need, not only

phyiscally

Correct your spelling

physically

all the time

will

Correct pronoun usage

, which will

show examples

make them feel the presence of

Use synonyms

thier

Correct your spelling

their

parents

Use synonyms

better.

ma.f.7.2000

Mar 22, 2026

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response

Write your main idea in a more clear way in each body part.

task response

Answer both sides of the topic fully, then give your own view clearly.

task response

Add one more clear example for each side.

coherence and cohesion

Use linking words like first, however, for example, and in conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Make each paragraph stay on one main point.

coherence and cohesion

Explain your ideas more, so the reader can follow your meaning easily.

task response

You discussed both sides of the topic.

task response

You gave your own opinion in the end.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has an introduction, body, and conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

You used some linking words like however and moreover.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

213 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

dual-income households
standard of living
extra-curricular activities
private education
financial stability
independence
responsibility
emotional support
academic support
parental guidance
strain on family relationships
external caregivers
flexible working hours
work-from-home opportunities
quality time management
balanced approach

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Most young people without a partner would prefer to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. yet being in a relationship when you are young is not always a good idea. as part of a class project, write about whether you agree or disagree. give reasons for your answer.
In this contemporary epoch, the maximum youngster has a boyfriend or girlfriend as they do not want to live alone. Some people say that it is not beneficial to have a partner at a very young age while critics do not agree. I wholeheartedly believe that having a partner is a huge financial burden and a stress. This essay will delve into both viewpoints and will lead to a logical conclusion as well.
6.5
band
You recently bought some train tickets for a journey a week in advance. When you went to the station to catch the train, you were told you could not use the tickets and the staff were very unhelpful to you. Write a letter to the train company. In your letter ◦ describe the problem you had with the tickets ◦ say why you were unhappy with the staff ◦ suggest what action the train company should take
I hope this message finds you well. I'm writing to express the unpleasant situation that happened to me at the train station. I bought 3 tickets on 23 July for a trip to my family in Japan on 30 July, however, when I arrived at the station the staff told me that I was not able to catch the train in disrespectful way. Moreover, they did not attempt to clarify the situation to me which is terrible behaviour. Additionally, I want some help with other staff but they were busy and it seems that they have more commitments to do. Finally, as you are the person who is responsible for the training station I ask you to provide professional training to the staff to improving their services and personal characteristics. I hope to change my expired tickets to new ones and send me a real apology letter to make me feel satisfied and happy. Thank you for your time I hope I was clear and positive. I'm eagerly waiting for your response.
8
band
Some people think that planting trees in open space cities and towns is more important than building houses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In this contemporary era, some individuals believe planting greenery in open spaces is more crucial than building new apartments. However, I absolutely disagree with this because a stable settlement will promote economic growth.
6.5
band
it is a natural process for animal species to become extinct (dinosaur, dodo) there is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening. to what extent do you agree or disagree?
annihilation of animals has been occured in some geological eras which had been an inevitable part of evolution. There are a number of individuals who argue that preventing this natural process is not imperative. I am definitely against this attitude.
7
band
Some people believe that having sport in schools is a waste of time and resources, whilst other people believe that sport in schools is a vital part of education. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.
A fewer number of people believe that extracurricular activities are not worthy of spending a massive amount of funds and time whereas another group is of the view that sport plays an essential role in education and should be focused in educational institutions. According to my opinion, both of these aspects hold weight and careful consideration should be taken while deciding to include or exclude sports from schools. This essay sheds light on both notions by stating logical reasons backed by substantial facts.

In today's competitive world, many families find it necessary for both parents to go out to work. While some say the children in these families benefit from the additional income, others feel they lack support because of their parent's absence. Discussion

Most young people without a partner would prefer to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. yet being in a relationship when you are young is not always a good idea. as part of a class project, write about whether you agree or disagree. give reasons for your answer.

Some people think that planting trees in open space cities and towns is more important than building houses. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

it is a natural process for animal species to become extinct (dinosaur, dodo) there is no reason why people should try to prevent this from happening. to what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that having sport in schools is a waste of time and resources, whilst other people believe that sport in schools is a vital part of education. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.