Many aspects of the way people dress today are influenced by global fashion trends. How has global fashion become such a strong influence on people's lives? Do you think this is a positive or negative development?

People
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nowadays are widely influenced by
globalization
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globalisation
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, icluding in the aspect of
fashion
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. Nearly everyone in
developed
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a developed
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society cannot escape
from
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apply
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the impact of global
fashion
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trends
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. Global
fashion
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trends
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shape
people
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's dressing in various ways. The advertisement is one of the examples. Every day,
audience
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audiences
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all over the world
recieve
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receive
a
siginificant
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significant
number of advertisements from information channels like TVs and social media. They
thus
Linking Words
accept images of beauty formed by big enterprises and
then
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purchase the same clothing as models
on
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in
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advertisements. As a
results
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result
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,
people
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become eager to follow the
fashion
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trends
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created by strong countries and keep chasing after
trends
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seasons
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season
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by
seasons
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season
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, buying a large amount of fashionable but
unneccesary
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unnecessary
clothes. I firmly believe that it
it
Verb problem
is
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a negative development.
First,
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people
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influenced by global
fashion
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trends
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waste money on something they do not actually need. Meanwhile, clothes produced by
global
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the global
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fashion
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industry are often
vulenrable
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vulnerable
, so consumers have to alter them regularly. It is a harmful phenomenon destroy the earth envirionment.
Besides
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, following global
fashion
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trends
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makes
people
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dress in similar ways.
For a
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In the
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long term, it declines cultural varieties. Local clothing will gradually vanish since
eveyone
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everyone
only wants to wear clothes under global
fashion
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trends
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. For
illustrate
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example
,
people
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in
East
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Eastern
countries do not wear their traditional clothing in
everydaylife
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everyday life
. They tend to put on
western
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Western
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clothing to fit in
popular
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with popular
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culture.
To conclude
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,
drawbacks
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the drawbacks
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of global
fasion
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fashion
trends
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far outweigh
its
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their
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merits. In my opinion, global
fasion
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fashion
trends
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is
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are
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affecting our society negatively. It enslaves
people
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around the world. Everyone in society is under its control. It is hard to stop, unless we collectively become aware of its existence and influence and start to change.

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task response
Answer both parts more fully. You say why global fashion is strong, and you say it is negative, but some ideas are very short.
task response
Explain your main ideas more. For example, say more about how ads, social media, and famous people change what people buy.
task response
Use clearer examples. Your example about East countries is relevant, but it needs more detail.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end, which is good. Keep this structure.
coherence and cohesion
Some links are good, like First, Meanwhile, Besides, and To conclude. But some sentences do not connect smoothly.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in one paragraph and develop it step by step. This will make your argument easier to follow.
task response
You answer both questions in the task.
task response
Your opinion is clear all through the essay.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has an introduction and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Your paragraphs are clear and easy to see.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • global
  • fashion
  • clothes
  • dress
  • wear
  • look
  • style
  • brand
  • label
  • shop
  • price
  • money
  • media
  • ads
  • post
  • like
  • world
  • culture
  • express
  • expression
  • culture
  • work
  • jobs
  • earth
  • environment
  • press
  • pressure
  • spend
  • buy
  • design
  • trend
  • brand
  • celeb
  • celebrity
  • internet
  • online
  • shop
  • social
  • media
  • fashion
  • trend
  • idea
  • choice
  • fit
  • color
  • color
  • cloth
  • fabric
  • hand
  • care
  • harm
  • good
  • bad
  • benefit
  • loss
  • balance
  • relation
  • impact
  • effect
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