IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

We can access information from the internet easily. Some people say that libraries are no longer necessary. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Throughout the years, accessing information from different sources has changed. Today , any data can be accessible through the
internet
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.
Due to
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 these changes, some
people
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 say that
libraries
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 aren’t necessary. I partially agree with
this
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 statement.
While
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 I believe that the
internet
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 is incredible for seeking information, I do not believe that
libraries
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 will become obsolete.
This
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 essay will provide evidence to support my opinion. On the one hand, the
internet
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 has made learning way more efficient and accessible.
First,
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people
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 no longer need to travel to
libraries
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 , which is time-consuming.
Instead
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, the
internet
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 provides e-books, which can be accessed quickly and easily.
Second,
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in
libraries
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,
people
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 usually deal with challenges in finding the right book. Electronic books can be easily found in a matter of seconds.
Finally
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, many students have research projects,and they tend to go through multiple books. The
internet
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 presents a wider range of information, much more than a library can possibly provide.
On the other hand
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,
libraries
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 are still necessary in society and serve an important purpose. To start with, many
people
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 like to visit
libraries
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 for the environment.
People
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 enjoy the social aspect within the library , enjoying the time spent there.
Moreover
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, even though the
internet
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 provides e-books, many reading lovers prefer hard copies.
For example
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, the older generation prefers tactile material and not technology.
Furthermore
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, it has been proven that screens can negatively affect
people
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's health. By providing alternative hard copies, readers are not subjected to screens. In conclusion, I think both the
internet
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 and
libraries
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 are important to different parts of society.
While
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 the
internet
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 is incredibly fast and convenient, it will never replace
libraries
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. There is ample use for both.

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task response
For task response: Your answer is clear, but make your main view stronger from the start and keep it the same all through the essay.
task response
For task response: Add one or two more clear and real examples to support your ideas, not only general points.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: Your essay has a good paragraph plan, but some links are a bit repeated. Try to use a wider range of simple linking words.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: Some sentences can be shorter and cleaner, so your ideas move more smoothly from one point to the next.
task response
For task response: You answered both sides and gave your own view clearly.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: Your introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion are all present and easy to follow.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: Each main paragraph stays on one main idea, which helps the reader.
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