Many parents believe that beating or spanking is a good way to discipline their children. To what extent do you agree? Write an essay of about 250-350 words. ielts

Some
parents
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think that smacking is an effective way to control
children
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's tantrums. As
children
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in
this
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generation have become increasingly difficult to manage,
parents
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often feel left with no option but to resort to spanking.
This
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reflects their desire to prevent their
children
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from continuing undesirable
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behavior
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behaviour
show examples
.
For instance
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, some mothers may easily stop their son or daughter from engaging in inappropriate
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behavior
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behaviour
show examples
by resorting to physical punishment. These examples illustrate why some
parents
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consider inflicting pain as the best way to avoid bad
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behavior
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behaviour
show examples
. Despite the outcomes that
parents
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expect—namely, proper
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behavior
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behaviour
show examples
—the belief that smacking is an effective method is completely misguided. There are countless ways to guide
children
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onto the right path without resorting to harm.
Children
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are capable of understanding appropriate
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behavior
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behaviour
show examples
when they are treated with gentleness.
For instance
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, engaging in deep conversations can significantly influence a child's mindset and help them tackle problems they face
instead
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of risking their mental health.
Overall
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, the notion that corporal punishment is the best method is untenable;
parents
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should explore other non-harmful ways to discipline their
children
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. In conclusion,
this
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essay has argued why corporal punishment against
children
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is unequivocally unacceptable. In my opinion, physically punishing
children
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is certainly not the correct method for discipline

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task response
Give a more direct answer in the first part. Say clearly how far you agree.
task response
Add one more clear main idea about why smacking is bad, such as fear, anger, or poor trust.
task response
Use examples that feel more real and more exact. Your example now is quite general.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas more smoothly with words like however, because, as a result, and for example.
coherence and cohesion
Make each body paragraph do one clear job: one for the other side, one for your view.
coherence and cohesion
Develop each main point a little more so the essay feels fuller and better supported.
coherence and cohesion
You have a clear paragraph plan with a beginning, body, and ending.
task response
Your opinion is clear in the second half and in the conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Most ideas stay on the topic and are easy to follow.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite
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