IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The graphs below shows the age of visitors from the UK to Spain in 1983 and 2003.

The pie charts illustrate the proportions of visitors from the UK to Spain by age
group
Use synonyms
 in 1983 and 2003.
Overall
Linking Words
, there was an increase in the proportion of older visitors, with those aged 55+ witnessing the most dramatic rise.
While
Linking Words
 the percentage of people aged 35–54 decreased,
this
Linking Words
group
Use synonyms
 remained the largest in both years. In 1983, people aged 35–54 had the highest percentage at 50%, followed by those aged 25–34 at 20%. The figures for the 55+ and 0–15 groups were 16% and 10% respectively,
while
Linking Words
 the 16–24
group
Use synonyms
 had the lowest proportion at just 4%. In 2003, the proportion of people aged 35–54 decreased to 35%.
By contrast
Linking Words
, the percentage of those aged 55+ increased significantly to 26%. The figure for the 16–34
group
Use synonyms
 stood at 15%. The proportions of the 0–15 and 25–54 groups were equal, both at 12%, indicating relatively balanced percentages.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words group with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "figures" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportions" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decreased" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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