IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the interent users as aprecentage of population in the USA,Mexico and Canada.

The line graph illustrates the percentage of people using
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 in three different countries
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as the US,
Mexico
Use synonyms
 and
Canada
Use synonyms
from
Punctuation problem
, from
show examples
 1999
and
Change preposition
to
show examples
 2009.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the rate of
users
Use synonyms
 in
Canada
Use synonyms
 reached the peak,
while
Linking Words
Mexico
Use synonyms
 experienced a slight increase throughout the period. In 1999, the
buyers
Check wording
number
show examples
 of internet
in
Check wording
users in
show examples
Canada
Use synonyms
 started at 10%
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 dramatically
reached
Wrong verb form
, reaching
show examples
 around 60%
users
Use synonyms
 in 2003,
while
Linking Words
 in the US begun at 20%
users
Use synonyms
 until it
faced
Verb problem
reached
show examples
 a slight climb
roughly
Change preposition
of roughly
show examples
 30%.
However
Linking Words
,
Mexico
Use synonyms
 started at
lowest
Correct determiner usage
its lowest
show examples
 point at around 5%
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it rose steadily
reaching
Punctuation problem
, reaching
show examples
 at 20% of
users
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the average spent online in
Canada
Use synonyms
 has sharply rise reached at 100%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the second
users
Use synonyms
 of the internet in the US experienced
level
Correct article usage
a level
show examples
 of
reached
Replace the word
reach
 at 80%, but the
users
Use synonyms
 in
Mexico
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 a small
increased reached
Replace the word
increase in reach
 at 30% throughout the period.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words mexico, canada, users with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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