IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The graph below shows the interent users as aprecentage of population in the USA,Mexico and Canada.

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The line graph illustrates the percentage of people using
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
 in three different countries
Linking Words
such
Punctuation problem
, such
show examples
 as the US,
Mexico
Use synonyms
 and
Canada
Use synonyms
from
Punctuation problem
, from
show examples
 1999
and
Change preposition
to
show examples
 2009.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the rate of
users
Use synonyms
 in
Canada
Use synonyms
 reached the peak,
while
Linking Words
Mexico
Use synonyms
 experienced a slight increase throughout the period. In 1999, the
buyers
Check wording
number
show examples
 of internet
in
Check wording
users in
show examples
Canada
Use synonyms
 started at 10%
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
show examples
 dramatically
reached
Wrong verb form
, reaching
show examples
 around 60%
users
Use synonyms
 in 2003,
while
Linking Words
 in the US begun at 20%
users
Use synonyms
 until it
faced
Verb problem
reached
show examples
 a slight climb
roughly
Change preposition
of roughly
show examples
 30%.
However
Linking Words
,
Mexico
Use synonyms
 started at
lowest
Correct determiner usage
its lowest
show examples
 point at around 5%
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 it rose steadily
reaching
Punctuation problem
, reaching
show examples
 at 20% of
users
Use synonyms
.
In contrast
Linking Words
, the average spent online in
Canada
Use synonyms
 has sharply rise reached at 100%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the second
users
Use synonyms
 of the internet in the US experienced
level
Correct article usage
a level
show examples
 of
reached
Replace the word
reach
 at 80%, but the
users
Use synonyms
 in
Mexico
Use synonyms
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
 a small
increased reached
Replace the word
increase in reach
 at 30% throughout the period.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words mexico, canada, users with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "reached" was used 5 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "slight" was used 2 times.
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