IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that the government should pay for university education. Others, however, believe that students should pay for it themselves as it benefits the individuals more than the society. Discuss both views and give your opinion

willing to pay their own
fees
Use synonyms
 for college.
However
Linking Words
, the rising
tuition
Use synonyms
fers
Correct your spelling
fees
 from miversity has ben sky rocketed.
Thel
Correct your spelling
The
 toe, there is a Gurusation
betwen
Correct your spelling
between
 the stake
Shaded
Punctuation problem
. Shaded
show examples
 provide undergunduates for
thir
Correct your spelling
their
fees
Use synonyms
,
schlership
Correct your spelling
scholarship
 or
students
Use synonyms
 should frater financially
support
Use synonyms
 themselves for
education
Use synonyms
.  From my point of
view
Add a comma
view,
show examples
 the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 should pory amount of
education
Use synonyms
fees
Use synonyms
 for learners to
support
Use synonyms
 their
education
Use synonyms
. There are
few
Correct article usage
a few
show examples
 reasons to
support
Use synonyms
 my views.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, among the rising
tuition
Use synonyms
fas
Correct your spelling
fees
, a wide portion of
students
Use synonyms
 cannot
support
Use synonyms
 themselves for higher
education
Use synonyms
. For some
undevelop
Correct your spelling
underdeveloped
 countries,
west of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the citizens did not
reGive
Correct your spelling
receive
 a higher
education
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
, their
techuligy
Correct your spelling
technology
 or development
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 not well-prepared; because of the lack
Use synonyms
education
Change preposition
of education
show examples
, economic benefit status can be shown
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
by these countries.  By
constract
Correct your spelling
contrast
, in a well develop Countries,
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
 United Kingdom, Canada, Duited States. They offer a large
amout
Correct your spelling
amount
 of
schlorship
Correct your spelling
scholarship
 or
fees
Use synonyms
 for their locals.
Therefore
Linking Words
, a higher
education
Use synonyms
 provides
students
Use synonyms
 with advanced
skill
Check wording
skills
show examples
 or
knendedge
Correct your spelling
knowledge
,
hence
Linking Words
, it will cultivate
high
Rephrase
highly
show examples
 educated
guadustes
Correct your spelling
graduates
. As a large amount of
high
Rephrase
highly
show examples
 skilled
-
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
peuple
Correct your spelling
people
 work for the country, the
advenced
Correct your spelling
advanced
 technology
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 economic can be more developed. 
On the other hand
Linking Words
, the educational
fees
Use synonyms
 should be paid by
students
Use synonyms
. I am convinced that if learners want to achieve more
advance
Replace the word
advanced
 knowledge or skills, they should
paid
Wrong verb form
pay
show examples
 their own
tuition
Use synonyms
fees
Use synonyms
. It is
believe
Wrong verb form
believed
show examples
 that, if the
stake hilders
Correct your spelling
stakeholders
support
Use synonyms
students
Use synonyms
 for their
education
Use synonyms
, some
undugundustes
Correct your spelling
underdogs
 may not study seriously. That
cause
Correct subject-verb agreement
causes
show examples
 waste of money or
schlership
Correct your spelling
scholarship
 from the
Goverment
Correct your spelling
Government
.
Also
Linking Words
, if
students
Use synonyms
 are willing to pay their
onem fes
Correct your spelling
own fees
,
individuds
Correct your spelling
individuals
 sense the responsibility and motivation for learning. 
To sum up
Linking Words
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
,
It
Fix capitalization
it
show examples
 is
cmunced
Correct your spelling
concluded
 that
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 the
goverment
Correct your spelling
government
 should pay
tuition
Use synonyms
fees
Use synonyms
 for
leamers
Correct your spelling
learners
, it could boost the economic or skills for the country, by
cultivate
Wrong verb form
cultivating
show examples
 more highly educated
expert
Fix the agreement mistake
experts
show examples
. Despite the merits,
studant
Correct your spelling
students
 should
also
Linking Words
 seize the opportunity to learn.

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task response
Answer both sides in a more equal way. Your view is clear, but one side has more detail than the other side.
task response
Give clearer main ideas in each body paragraph. Some ideas are hard to follow because the meaning changes too fast.
task response
Use examples with simple and clear facts. Your country examples help, but explain them more directly.
coherence and cohesion
Make your paragraph order clearer: intro, one side, other side, your opinion, conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like first, also, however, because, so, and finally.
coherence and cohesion
Check each sentence so one idea leads to the next. Some sentences are not connected well.
task response
You answered the topic and gave your opinion.
task response
You discussed both views, not only one side.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
You used some linking words like however, therefore, and on the other hand.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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