IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many cities are facing serious traffic problems What problems does this cause and what solutions can you suggest ?

Many urban areas face difficulties with transportation. Cities complain about economic and environmental issues
due to
Linking Words
 inefficient infrastructure. Improving the public transportation network
,
Punctuation problem
apply
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 and banning outdated technology in
city
Use synonyms
centers
Change the spelling
centres
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,
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 could be a possible way to solve these problems. Customers and goods cannot be transported properly. Many Stores in the
city
Use synonyms
center
Change the spelling
centre
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 are running out of goods
and
Punctuation problem
, and
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less
Correct determiner usage
fewer
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 customers are visiting.
This
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 is because there are many traffic jams, and some parts of the
city
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 are barely reachable for trucks and
cars
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.
This
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 results in
an
Correct article usage
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financial damage for stores and malls.
In addition
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,
air
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 pollution in cities is constantly increasing.
This
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 is because many
cars
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 and trucks
exhaust
Verb problem
emit
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 toxic fumes
which
Punctuation problem
, which
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pollutes
Correct subject-verb agreement
pollute
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 the
air
Use synonyms
.
For Example
Linking Words
, many vehicles run on fossil fuels,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
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 are known as
a
Correct article usage
the
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 main source
for
Change preposition
of
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air
Use synonyms
 pollution in cities. Improving the Infrastructure could make a difference. Public transportation can significantly reduce the
amount
Check wording
number
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 of
cars
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 on the road.
This
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 leads to
less
Correct determiner usage
fewer
show examples
 traffic jams and improves access to urban areas. Another solution would be to ban combustion engines in
city
Use synonyms
centers
Change the spelling
centres
show examples
.
Although
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this
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 would not reduce the number of
cars
Use synonyms
 on the road, it is an effective way to reduce toxic gases in urban areas.
For Instance
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, an electric car doesn´t burn fuel. It uses energy from a
powerplant
Correct your spelling
power plant
,
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that is
Linking Words
 located outside of the
city
Use synonyms
.
To conclude
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, traffic issues could lead to severe environmental and economic difficulties. By improving urban infrastructure and banning technology
that is
Linking Words
 responsible for polluting the
air
Use synonyms
, these problems could be solved.

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task response
Answer both parts more directly. Say clearly what the traffic problems are, then give solutions in a clear way.
task response
Use more exact examples to support your ideas. Your examples are good, but they are still a bit general.
task response
Develop each main idea a little more so the reader can see how and why it works.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, middle, and end. Keep this structure.
coherence and cohesion
Link some ideas more smoothly. At times, the jump from one sentence to the next feels a bit sudden.
coherence and cohesion
Group ideas more carefully. For example, keep all problem ideas together and all solution ideas together with equal support.
task response
You answer the question and talk about both problems and solutions.
task response
Your main ideas are easy to follow.
coherence and cohesion
You use clear paragraphs with an introduction and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
Words like 'In addition' and 'To conclude' help guide the reader.
Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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