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Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Nowadays many people complain that they have difficulties getting enough sleep. What problems can lack of sleep cause? What can be done about lack of sleep?-

Nowadays, an increasing number of
people
Use synonyms
 are struggling to get enough sleep
due to
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 busy work schedules and modern lifestyles. Lack of sleep can cause several serious problems, but there are
also
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 some effective measures that can be taken to address
this
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 issue. One significant problem caused by insufficient sleep is a decline in work efficiency. When
people
Use synonyms
 do not get adequate rest, they often feel exhausted during the day, which makes it difficult for them to concentrate on tasks.
As a result
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, their productivity decreases
and
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, and
show examples
 they are more likely to make mistakes. In the long term,
this
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 may even affect their career performance.Another major issue is its negative impact on health. Sleep deprivation can weaken the immune system, making individuals more vulnerable to illnesses.
In addition
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, it can
also
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 lead to mental health problems
such
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 as stress and anxiety, especially when
people
Use synonyms
 are under constant pressure but lack proper rest. To tackle
this
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 problem, individuals should first develop healthy sleep habits.
For example
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, maintaining a regular sleeping schedule and avoiding excessive screen time before bed can significantly improve sleep quality.
This
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 is because reducing exposure to electronic devices helps the brain relax more easily, allowing
people
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 to fall asleep faster.At the same time, employers and governments should take responsibility by promoting a better work-life balance.
For instance
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, companies can limit overtime working hours and encourage employees to take sufficient breaks. By doing so, workers will have more time to rest, which can ultimately improve both their well-being and productivity. In conclusion, lack of sleep can result in reduced efficiency and serious health problems, but it can be addressed through both personal efforts and support from workplaces and governments.

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task response
For task response, your answer covers both questions well. To get a higher score, add one more clear result of poor sleep, like road accidents or family stress.
task response
For task response, your ideas are clear, but some points are a bit general. Try to explain one idea more deeply with a short real-life example.
task response
For task response, your examples are relevant, but they are still broad. Use one more specific example, such as office workers, students, or drivers.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear 4-paragraph structure, which is good. To improve more, make the link between some sentences smoother.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, you use linking words well, like 'as a result' and 'in addition'. Try not to place too many ideas in one long sentence.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your topic sentences are clear. For a higher score, make each body paragraph focus on one main idea with very even support.
task response
For task response, you answer both parts of the question in a clear way.
task response
For task response, your main ideas are relevant and easy to understand.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear opening, body, and ending.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, your ideas move in a logical order from problem to solution.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, you use simple linking words well and they help the reader follow your points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Insomnia
  • Sleep deprivation
  • Sleep disorders
  • Sleep quality
  • Fatigue
  • Exhaustion
  • Restless
  • Restorative sleep
  • REM sleep
  • Circadian rhythm
  • Sleep hygiene
  • Napping
  • Sleep duration
  • Melatonin
  • Sleep-inducing
  • Drowsiness
  • Sleep disturbances
  • Obstructive sleep apnea
  • Snoring
  • Sleepwalking
  • Sleep talking
  • Shift work
  • Sleeping pills
  • Sleep aid
  • Relaxation techniques
  • Meditation
  • Deep breathing
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