Some people believe that advertisements are amusing or annoying and they are not influenced by this when they sthop. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In modern society, we can see many

advertisements

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everywhere,

such

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as in shops and on the internet. Some

people

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think that

advertisements

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are annoying, so they ignore them and are not influenced when they shop. I strongly agree with

this

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opinion because too many

advertisements

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have a negative effect on our lives.

To begin

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with, seeing too many

advertisements

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in one place can make

people

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feel confused.

For example

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, when

people

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shop in a store, there are so many different

advertisements

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that it is difficult to find what they really want to buy. Because of

this

Linking Words

people

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often stop looking at the

advertisements

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and just focus on their shopping list.

As a result

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advertisements

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do not really influence their choices.

Furthermore

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, some

advertisements

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have uncomfortable or harmful information.

For instance

Linking Words

, when

people

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use social media, they often see

advertisements

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that are not related to their interests or even contain violent scenes.

This

Linking Words

can be a bad influence, especially on the younger generation.

Therefore

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instead

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of helping

people

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shop, these bad

advertisements

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make

people

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have a negative feeling about the brands. In conclusion, I firmly believe that having too many

advertisements

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is bad for

people

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. It not only causes stress but

also

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makes the quality of life lower

Correct word order

lowers the quality of life

show examples

by giving wrong information.

Therefore

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, the government should make stricter rules to protect

people

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from seeing too many

advertisements

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lyyn2

Apr 22, 2026

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task response

For task response, your answer is clear, but you should explain more why people are not influenced when they shop.

task response

For task response, your main idea is good, but some points are too general. Add one more clear example.

coherence and cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, your essay has a clear start, middle, and end, which is good.

coherence and cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, some ideas move too fast. Add a little more link between the example and the main point.

coherence and cohesion

For coherence and cohesion, each body paragraph has one main idea, but support is still a bit short.

task response

You answer the question and give a clear opinion from the start.

coherence and cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are both present and easy to follow.

coherence and cohesion

You use simple link words like 'To begin with', 'Furthermore', and 'Therefore' well.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

226 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

advertisement / advert
influence
brand
consumer
buying decision
catch attention
remember
repeat
popular
famous person
low price
special offer
online ad
social media
shop wisely
compare price
need vs want
make a choice
annoying
amusing

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Some people say that there is too much harmful content on the internet. They say the only way to make the internet safe is for the government to censor the content of websites. To what extent do you think the government should control what information is available on the internet?

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