IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

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Few countries
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 praise young students for doing
job
Correct article usage
a job
show examples
 or moving to a new destination before starting
there
Use the right word
their
show examples
 bachelor's degree.
This
Linking Words
 essay will discuss
,
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
 why
its
Use the right word
it's
show examples
 good
for
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
for students, in terms of experience gained by working and unlocking more
oportunities
Correct your spelling
opportunities
 by exploring different places.
Also
Linking Words
, the drawbacks in terms of not
able
Verb problem
being able
show examples
 to
persue thier
Correct your spelling
pursue their
further
Linking Words
 studies and
waste
Correct article usage
the waste
show examples
 of time.

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task response
Answer both sides more fully. You say good and bad points, but each side needs more detail.
task response
Use one main idea in one sentence, then add a short reason or example.
task response
Give a clear end sentence that sums up your view.
coherence and cohesion
Make your ideas go in a clear order: intro, good points, bad points, end.
coherence and cohesion
Do not use too many commas. This breaks the flow.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words like first, also, however, and in the end.
task response
You show both good and bad sides of the topic.
task response
Your main point is clear: work gives experience and travel opens new chances.
coherence and cohesion
You have an introduction sentence that shows the topic.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Cultural immersion
  • Life experience
  • Work ethic
  • Career readiness
  • Self-discovery
  • Delayed gratification
  • Intellectual stagnation
  • Financial implications
  • Social dynamics
  • Academic trajectory
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