Many people believe that social networking sites have huge negative effects on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the modern world, it is undeniable that social networking
sites
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have become an integral part of daily life. Some people believe that these
platforms
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have significant negative effects on
individuals
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and society,
while
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others argue that they
also
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provide important benefits.
Although
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some may agree with
this
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view, I partly support it
due to
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several reasons, which will be examined in
this
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essay. One of the most apparent reasons is that excessive use of social networking
sites
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can negatively affect mental health and social behaviour. To illustrate,
individuals
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may experience anxiety, low self-esteem, or addiction
due to
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constant comparison with others online.
For instance
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, users who spend long hours on social media may feel pressure to present a perfect image, which can lead to stress and dissatisfaction.
In addition
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, online
platforms
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can sometimes reduce face-to-face interaction, weakening real-life relationships and communication skills. Another point that should not be overlooked is that social networking
sites
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also
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offer significant advantages. To clarify, these
platforms
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enable people to connect and communicate across long distances, which strengthens relationships and global interaction.
For example
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,
individuals
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can stay in touch with friends and family, share information, and access educational content.
Furthermore
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, social media can support businesses and provide opportunities for learning and self-expression, which can benefit both
individuals
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and society. To recapitulate, it is evident that social networking
sites
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can have negative effects on mental health and social interaction,
while
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they
also
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provide valuable opportunities for communication and development.
Therefore
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, I believe that
although
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these
platforms
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can be harmful if overused, their
overall
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impact depends on how responsibly they are used.

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task response
Make your main view more clear from the start. You say you partly support the idea, but later your view is still a bit general.
task response
Add one or two more direct examples to show why social media hurts people and society.
task response
You answer both sides well, but the question asks how far you agree. Show this more strongly in each body part.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay is easy to follow because each part has a clear job.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words with more care. Some like 'to clarify' and 'to recapitulate' sound a bit forced.
coherence and cohesion
Some ideas could be developed more deeply, especially the effect on society, not only on the person.
coherence and cohesion
The essay has a clear introduction, two body parts, and a clear ending.
coherence and cohesion
Each paragraph stays on one main idea, so the reader can follow your points easily.
task response
You give a balanced answer and address both harm and benefit.
task response
Your examples about stress, long distance contact, and learning are relevant to the topic.
Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general
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