In many countries the amount of crime is increasing What do you think are the main causes of this? How can we deal with those causes?

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In today’s fast-paced world, there has been a significant increase in criminal activity, largely

due to

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economic hardship, emotional

instability

Use synonyms

, and psychological problems.

However

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, I strongly believe that

this

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phenomenon can be effectively addressed by implementing appropriate measures, which will be discussed

further

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. The primary contributor to criminal activity is economic difficulty, as many

individuals

Use synonyms

cannot cover their monthly expenses and

therefore

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tend to commit petty crimes,

such

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as shoplifting and theft. Large urban centres like Astana, where people’s monthly expenditure surpasses their income, are reported to experience a rise in

crime

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rates

due to

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financial

instability

Use synonyms

. Even when

individuals

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manage to find employment, they may leave their jobs

due to

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high stress levels, which can result in financial hardship and increased vulnerability.

Consequently

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, unemployed people tend to commit crimes in order to afford basic needs

such

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as food, accommodation, and clothing. Another factor contributing to high

crime

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rates is emotional

instability

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, mainly

due to

Linking Words

poor interpersonal relationship management.

This

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is particularly evident when married couples have frequent quarrels, which can lead to frustration and disappointment.

Subsequently

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, some

individuals

Use synonyms

may resort to criminal

behaviour

Use synonyms

Finally

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, a small proportion of

individuals

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engage in criminal

behaviour

Use synonyms

due to

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psychological

instability

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, including emotions

such

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as obsession, hatred, and anger, which may lead to violent acts

such

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as assault or even attempted murder.

While

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it is evident that the complete elimination of

crime

Use synonyms

is unattainable, certain measures can be implemented to discourage people from engaging in

such

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activities. A feasible approach could be to provide temporary financial support to those who are economically disadvantaged.

In addition

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, governments should introduce economic support packages to minimise the negative consequences of unemployment.

Moreover

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, families can receive consultations from family therapists, allowing them to avoid frequent quarrels.

As a result

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, married couples can improve their

behaviour

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and follow social rules.

Finally

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and most importantly, authorities should carefully examine young

individuals

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behaviour

Use synonyms

during their school years in order to detect any psychological disorders, enabling them to prevent potential violations. In conclusion, people commit crimes

due to

Linking Words

economic hardship, emotional

instability

Use synonyms

, and psychological problems, as mentioned above.

However

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this

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issue can be effectively alleviated by implementing strategies

such

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as providing financial aid, participating in family therapy, and carefully observing inappropriate behaviours. Combined actions involving not only state authorities but

also

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the public itself can significantly reduce

crime

Use synonyms

rates in the long term.

pandatvin3

Apr 29, 2026

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task response

Answer both parts more directly in each body part.

task response

Give one more clear and real example to support your ideas.

task response

Some ideas are good, but a few are too general. Explain them a bit more clearly.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay is easy to follow, but some linking words are used too often.

coherence and cohesion

Try to make each paragraph have one main focus only.

coherence and cohesion

A few sentences are long. Shorter sentences can make your meaning clearer.

task response

You answered both questions in the task.

task response

Your main ideas are clear and mostly relevant to the topic.

coherence and cohesion

Your essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.

coherence and cohesion

Your paragraphs are in a logical order.

coherence and cohesion

You use linking words well in many places.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

392 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

economic disparity
propensity
recidivism
deterrent
rehabilitative
judicial system
corruption
socioeconomic
alienation
stigmatization
decriminalization
enforcement
gentrification
preemptive measures
intervention strategies

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In many countries the amount of crime is increasing What do you think are the main causes of this? How can we deal with those causes?

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal informatoin, such as their hobbies and interests, and wheteher they are married or single. some people say tha this information may be releveant and useful. other disagree. discuss both views amd give your own opinioon

'People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities.' To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction? * Social media networks = messaging and information exchange systems such as Facebook and Twitter.

Environmental protection should be the responsibility of politicians, not individuals as individuals can do too little. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that it is more effective for students to study in a group while others believe that it is better for them to study alone. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Many jobs used to be done at home by hand, but now a days an increasing number of them are done using machines instead. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this development.