The diagram below shows the manufacturing process for making sugar from sugar cane. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

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The diagram shows a multible steps of making a sweetener from nature and discussing the process of it.
Overall
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, 7 steps to make the sugar from farms to get the end product of sweetener in the stores and
able
Verb problem
be able
show examples
to be consumed. Starting from harvesting to
end up in
Verb problem
apply
show examples
drying and cooling .
In addition
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, there are two ways to harvest the sugar cane. First of all, growing the sugarcane can take 12 to 18 months to be ready to harvest,
then
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manually or
automatic
Replace the word
automatically
harvesting takes the way to the next step. Crushing the green product to turn it into a juice in the third step.
Next,
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purifying the juice by using filters.
According to
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the fifth step , juice becomes a syrup after heating and evaporation of the extra water. After that centerfuge using speed motion to separate suger crystal from the syrup to get solid minerals out of it.
Last
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one , the crystals were taken to be dried and cooled to be sold in the stores.

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • mature
  • harvest
  • extract
  • purification
  • impurities
  • evaporation
  • thick syrup
  • crystallization
  • centrifugation
  • molasses
  • raw sugar crystals
  • refinement
  • purify
  • whiten
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