IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 3.5

The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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Introduction
The most essential purpose of scientific study is definitely how to enhance
lives
Correct article usage
the lives
show examples
 of people. I partially agree that improving
people’s
Use synonyms
 lives must be a certain goal of science,
although
Linking Words
another
Correct determiner usage
other
show examples
 studies
also
Linking Words
 play a crucial role.
Body · 1
On the one hand, the
public
Check wording
public's
show examples
 physical condition must be the top priority. The primary factor
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 advances in medicine
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 help
controlled
Wrong verb form
control
show examples
 deadly diseases and significantly extend life expectancy. In the future, scientists will not only treat different
illness
Fix the agreement mistake
illnesses
show examples
,
they
Correct word choice
but they
show examples
Linking Words
also can
Correct word order
can also
show examples
 develop a vaccine. Next vital thing is different technology which
available
Verb problem
is available
show examples
 for as thank to scientists.
In other words
Linking Words
, experts do ours life better and easier.
For instance
Linking Words
,
develop
Wrong verb form
developing
show examples
 technology,
internet
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
, smartphones
and
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
 etc. save time and
improving
Wrong verb form
improves
show examples
 living standards.
Body · 2
On the other hand
Linking Words
, it is true that another important aim of science should be protecting the environment. It is essential to
that
Verb problem
note
show examples
 that nature affect on
people’s
Use synonyms
life to
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
, so we can’t just ignore
this
Linking Words
 topic. Nowadays we have a considerable
amount
Check wording
number
show examples
 of problems related with environment. With different
research
Add a comma
research,
show examples
 it is possible to reduce pollution and protect natural resources. If people do not take care of nature, future
generation
Check wording
generations
show examples
 may face
with
Change preposition
apply
show examples
serious consequences.
Conclusion
In conclusion,
it is clear that
Linking Words
people’s
Use synonyms
 lives are really important and
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
 need
are improving
Wrong verb form
to improve
show examples
 their quality.
However
Linking Words
, it is
also
Linking Words
 important not to forget about
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
,
becouse
Correct your spelling
because
this
Linking Words
 aspect
also
Linking Words
 influence on
people’s
Use synonyms
 lifestyle.

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task response
Give a clearer answer to the question. Say more clearly how much you agree or disagree.
task response
Add one or two more clear examples to support your main ideas.
task response
Explain your ideas more fully. Some points are good, but they are too short.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer topic sentences at the start of each body paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
Link ideas with simple words like also, because, so, and however in a careful way.
coherence and cohesion
Make each sentence easy to follow. Some sentences are hard to understand now.
task response
You answer both sides of the topic and give your opinion.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
The main ideas are relevant to the question.
Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • crucial role
  • technological advancements
  • medical discoveries
  • life-changing inventions
  • innovations
  • solutions to human problems
  • enhancing quality of life
  • improvement of healthcare
  • transportation
  • communication
  • agriculture
  • energy sectors
  • eradication of diseases
  • prolongation of life expectancy
  • global challenges
  • climate change
  • overpopulation
  • food security
  • developed world
  • underprivileged communities
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