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Writing Samples
Band 7

It is now possible for scientist in tourists to travel to remote natural environments such as the south pole. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

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Nowadays, it is possible for scientists and
tourists
Use synonyms
 to travel to remote natural environments
such
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 as the South Pole.
Although
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this
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 development has some disadvantages, I believe the advantages are greater. One major advantage is that scientists can study these remote areas more easily.
For example
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, they can research climate change, animal life, and environmental conditions in places that were difficult to reach in the past. The information collected from these studies can help governments and people understand global warming and protect the environment more effectively. Another benefit is that tourism can increase people’s awareness of nature. When
tourists
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 visit places like the South Pole, they may learn more about the importance of protecting the Earth.
In addition
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, tourism can bring economic benefits because travel companies, guides, and local services can earn more money from visitors.
However
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, there are
also
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 some disadvantages. One problem is that
tourists
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 may damage the natural environment. Remote places are usually very fragile, and pollution from transport, hotels, or human activities can harm wildlife and nature.
For example
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, animals may be disturbed by large numbers of visitors. Another disadvantage is that travelling to extreme environments can be dangerous and expensive.
Tourists
Use synonyms
 may face serious weather conditions, accidents, or health problems during their trips. Governments and rescue teams may
also
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 need to spend a lot of money to ensure safety. In conclusion,
although
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 travelling to remote natural areas has some negative effects on the environment, I believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages because it supports scientific research and increases public awareness about nature.

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coherence cohesion
Make your main idea more clear in each body part.
coherence cohesion
Use more direct links between ideas, not only basic words like 'another' and 'however'.
task achievement
Add one more clear and real example to support your points.
task achievement
Explain why the good points are stronger than the bad points in more detail.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end.
task achievement
You answer the question and give your opinion all the way through.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are easy to follow.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • remote area = a place far away from cities and people
  • natural environment = the land, water, weather, plants, and animals in a place
  • scientific research = careful study to learn new facts
  • climate change = long-term change in the world's weather
  • protect wildlife = keep animals safe
  • fragile ecosystem = a natural system that is easy to harm
  • disturb animals = make animals afraid or change their normal life
  • carbon emissions = gases from planes and ships that harm the climate
  • environmental damage = harm to nature
  • raise awareness = help people know and care more
  • strict rules = strong laws or controls
  • limit tourist numbers = allow only a small number of visitors
  • rescue operation = work to save people in danger
  • outweigh = be greater or more important than
  • sustainable tourism = travel that tries not to harm nature
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