IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

People living in the twenty first century generally have a better quality of life than people who lived in previous centuries. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It is widely believed that individuals had better living standards in
early
Correct article usage
the early
show examples
 decades than now. I firmly agree with the notion that
people
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 have a better quality of
life
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 in
this
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 modern era. In previous centuries,
people
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 had to suffer from medical emergencies. There were no
such
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 medical professionals, equipment and hospitals available for treatment in need. Countless deaths occurred from curable diseases,
such
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 as the flu or fever. Surgery was very dangerous at that time.
Life
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 expectancy was very low, nearly 40 to 50 years. But in the 21st century, medical science has gained huge enhancements. Nowadays, we have enhanced medical facilities, modern medicines, and vaccines. Doctors can perform surgeries to treat serious diseases,
for instance
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, cancer and heart problems.
For
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this
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 reason, the average lifespan of humans has increased. The average
life
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 expectancy has increased from 70 to 80 years in many countries.
Therefore
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, health care is a big reason for
better
Correct article usage
a better
show examples
 quality of
life
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 today. Daily
life
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 has become much easier now because of the invention of technology. In the past,
people
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 had to work very hard for basic necessities. They did not have electricity, vehicles, or smartphones. They used fire for cooking and light. Travel was much slower and more difficult in earlier ages. But these days we have access to electricity, the internet, mobile phones, and fast communication systems.
People
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 can handle their rough calculating tasks through computers within a minute. They can communicate with others residing in different nations using video calls. Buying goods,
such
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 as groceries and clothes , online from home can be done using smart devices. These things need less time and effort, which makes
life
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 much easier compared to the past. So technology gives
people
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 more freedom and less stress. In conclusion, I agree that in
this
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 modern era, individuals have better
life
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 opportunities than at any previous time. The main reasons are better health care and modern technology. These things make
life
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 longer, safer, and more comfortable than in previous centuries.

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task response
For task response: Your answer is clear and you give your opinion from the start. To get a higher score, add one short opposite idea, then show why your view is stronger.
task response
For task response: Your main ideas are good, but some points are a bit general. Add one more real and clear example in each body paragraph.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: Your essay has a clear shape with introduction, two body parts, and conclusion. To improve, use topic sentences that match the question more closely.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: The links are clear, but some are repeated, like 'In the past' and 'But'. Try to vary linking words in a simple way.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: Some sentences can flow better. You can group similar ideas together and avoid very short support at the end of a paragraph.
task response
For task response: You answer the question directly and keep the same clear position all through the essay.
task response
For task response: Your ideas about health care and technology are both relevant to quality of life.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: The essay is easy to follow and each paragraph has one main idea.
coherence and cohesion
For coherence and cohesion: You have both an introduction and a conclusion, and they clearly frame the essay.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Quality of life
  • Technological advancements
  • Healthcare improvements
  • Life expectancy
  • Mortality rates
  • Standard of living
  • Economic growth
  • Job opportunities
  • Education access
  • Literacy rates
  • Human rights
  • Gender equality
  • Working conditions
  • Industrialization
  • Environmental issues
  • Modern conveniences
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