Public holiday celebrations are held by most conutries. Some people say that governmnt should spend money on other useful things! Do you agree or disagree?

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Ceremonies are celebrated throughout the world every year in many countries. Several individuals believe that the government ought to invest in other beneficial things. I completely disagree with

this

Linking Words

idea since

Linking Words

this

Correct pronoun usage

show examples

might bring a number of benefits in the long run. The main reason for

prioritizing

Change the spelling

prioritising

show examples

festivals is that they can help to

stabilize

Change the spelling

stabilise

show examples

the financial situation through tourism in the

country

Use synonyms

That is

Linking Words

to say, ceremonies

such

Linking Words

as historical re-enactments or unusual events compel tourists to the

country

Use synonyms

For example

Linking Words

, Japan has a show that includes

people

Use synonyms

role-playing as local heroes from WW2 or sky exhibitions that demonstrate a variety of entertaining shapes that will go viral through internet.

As a result

Linking Words

, many

people

Use synonyms

intrigued

Verb problem

are intrigued

show examples

to enjoy

from

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the closer view

which

Punctuation problem

, which

show examples

gives a motive to visit the

country

Use synonyms

. If it were not for

this

Linking Words

, the

country

Use synonyms

would be isolated from the open world, which

also

Linking Words

causes to lacking from developing. That’s why we cannot completely decline public holiday celebrations.

However

Linking Words

, another notion against

this

Linking Words

is that

Change preposition

apply

show examples

decreasing the number of public holiday celebrations can give the government a chance to save

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

budget for more significant projects.

In other words

Linking Words

, there are

people

Use synonyms

who are living in poverty in rural areas of the

country

Use synonyms

Punctuation problem

, or

show examples

there are schools and hospitals

which is

Correct subject-verb agreement

that are

show examples

in need of restoration.

For instance

Linking Words

, in many developed countries

Linking Words

such

Punctuation problem

, such

show examples

Finland

Punctuation problem

Finland,

show examples

focused its

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

budget

towards

Verb problem

is focused on

show examples

educational purposes by spending

least

Correct article usage

the least

show examples

amount of money for negligible things, or

switzerland

Change preposition

in Switzerland,

show examples

the

most

Rephrase

apply

show examples

richest

country

Use synonyms

in the world.

Consequently

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

will increase the financial awareness of the local

people

Use synonyms

in the

country

Use synonyms

, which in turn will diminish poverty.

Thus

Linking Words

, the reduction of the ceremonies will play

crucial

Correct article usage

a crucial

show examples

role in society. In conclusion, in order to increase the economy and keep up with the pacing world’s speed, public holidays are vital since it provides with money.

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, allocating the budget towards

another

Correct determiner usage

other

show examples

chief issues is

also

Linking Words

important

and

Punctuation problem

, and

show examples

from my perspective is

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

to maintain the balance.

habibullohnomonov080

Jun 3, 2026

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task response

Make your main view more clear from start to end. You say you fully disagree, but in the end you say balance is best. This changes your answer.

task response

Add ideas that directly answer the question. Explain more why public holidays are worth public money.

task response

Use examples that are more clear and more real. Some examples now are hard to trust or not fully linked to your point.

coherence and cohesion

Make each body paragraph follow one clear plan: main idea, explain it, then give one strong example.

coherence and cohesion

Link sentences more smoothly. Some lines feel hard to follow because the grammar breaks the flow.

coherence and cohesion

Use simple, clear topic sentences. This will help the reader see your point fast.

coherence and cohesion

You have a clear essay shape with introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.

task response

You try to give reasons and examples for both sides of the topic.

coherence and cohesion

Your first body paragraph stays mostly on one main idea: tourism and money.

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
21
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

331 words

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Public holiday celebrations are held by most conutries. Some people say that governmnt should spend money on other useful things! Do you agree or disagree?

In many developing countries today, air pollution is a major issue. What are causes and could be taken to prevent this problem in the future?

In some countries, young people are encouraged to work or travel for a year between finishing high school and starting university studies. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for young people who decide to do this.

Some think that women should be treated as equal as men when applying to the jobs in military sector. Others think that they are not suitable for this. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many people believe that social networking sites (such as Facebook) have had a [huge negative impact on both individuals and society. To what extent do you agree?