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Writing Samples
Band 6

In many parts of the world, people now often throw things away when they are broken and buy new ones, whereas in the past broken things were repaired and used again. Why do you think this is the case? What problems may it lead to?

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In most states around the world, most individuals get rid of broken commodities and purchase new products. Previously, society fixed spoiled
things
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 and utilized again.
This
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 condition is derived from a wide range of low-cost products and a lack of repair skills.
Quality
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 may deteriorate, and environmental problems will increase because of unnecessary actions. There are many cases of throwing
things
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 away
instead
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 of repairing.One of them is that there is a huge variety of new commodities.Community prefer buying new ones rather than fixing.It saves their time.Another reason for
this
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 circumstance is the low cost.There is competition in the trade industry.Because of the huge variation and mass production, manufacturers have to lower prices to sell their commodities.The same
things
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 are available to customers.Nowadays, people consider that skills which need to fix
things
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 are not necessary
during
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in
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 their daily life; there are special people to repair broken
things
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.These are the main reasons for
this
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 circumstance.
This
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 phenomenon leads to several problems, including environmental issues and low
quality
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.Throwing
things
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 creates a huge quantity of waste.Some items encompass several poisonous additives.When it is thrown, ingredients may impact nature
such
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 as plants, animals and armosphere and at the same time, recycling
such
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 kinds of
things
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 may require labour-intensive methods.Another burden is that the
quality
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 may deteriorate. Because most producers crave to sell their products, they try to manufacture massive amounts of production
while
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 neglecting
quality
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. In conclusion, nowadays, it is a widespread trend among individuals that
things
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 which are broken are thrown away
instead
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 of being repaired. Huge variation, affordable prices, and low skills are basic causes of
this
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 condition.
This
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 leads to environmental issues and lower
quality
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task response
Answer both parts more fully. You explain why people throw things away, but the problems part needs more depth.
task response
Add one clear example for each main idea. This will make your points stronger and easier to trust.
task response
Make your ideas clearer with simpler and more direct sentences. Some parts are hard to follow.
coherence and cohesion
Use clearer links between ideas and sentences. At times the flow is a bit sudden.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each paragraph and explain it step by step.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence joining and spacing after full stops. This will make the essay easier to read.
task response
You answer both questions in the task.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task response
The main ideas are mostly relevant to the topic.
coherence and cohesion
You use basic paragraphing, which helps the reader follow your essay.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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