IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Government should spend money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree.

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Nowadays,
people
Use synonyms
 live in
modern
Correct article usage
the modern
show examples
 era where every amenities are available
and
Punctuation problem
, and
show examples
 there are
lot
Correct article usage
a lot
show examples
 of
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
 about spending money on so many issues. If
people
Use synonyms
 talk about
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should
utilize
Change the spelling
utilise
show examples
 money on
railways
Use synonyms
instead
Linking Words
 of
roads
Use synonyms
.
This
Linking Words
 essay partially
agree
Correct subject-verb agreement
agrees
show examples
 with
this
Linking Words
 statement and
give
Correct subject-verb agreement
gives
show examples
further
Linking Words
 discussion in
upcoming
Correct article usage
the upcoming
show examples
 paragraphs.
At
Change preposition
In
show examples
 recent times,everyone
want
Correct subject-verb agreement
wants
show examples
 to travel by airways or
railways
Use synonyms
 because both are less time-consuming
as well as
Linking Words
 safer than
roads
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
Railways
Use synonyms
 are more convenient, safe,and flexible.To
examplify
Correct your spelling
exemplify
,
railways
Use synonyms
 provide much more facilities for
elder
Correct word choice
older
show examples
people
Use synonyms
, young
and
Check wording
people, and
show examples
 children
,if
Punctuation problem
. If
show examples
 older
people
Use synonyms
 can not travel by sitting
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 one place for
longer
Correct determiner usage
a long
show examples
 time
so
Punctuation problem
,
show examples
 they provide sleeping arrangements
Linking Words
Punctuation problem
, due
show examples
due to
Correct word choice
so
show examples
this
Linking Words
 they can relax throughout
whole
Correct article usage
the whole
show examples
 journey.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
railways
Use synonyms
 are cheaper than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
other
travelling
Replace the word
travel
 services. To illustrate
this
Linking Words
,
railways
Use synonyms
 provide ample
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
facilities
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
it
Fix the agreement mistake
they
show examples
also
Linking Words
 include low cost tickets than
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
airlines.Indian railway start new trains,which
called
Verb problem
are called
show examples
 Vande Bharat
it
Punctuation problem
. It
show examples
 is
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 best example of that.
However
Linking Words
,
roads
Use synonyms
 are more useful in daily
life
Use synonyms
 because everyone mostly prefers to travel by
road
Use synonyms
.
Additionally
Linking Words
,every local resident
use
Correct subject-verb agreement
uses
show examples
road
Use synonyms
 transportation
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to reach their
work place
Correct your spelling
workplace
 or
education
Replace the word
educational
 place.
For example
Linking Words
, if students go
their
Change preposition
to their
show examples
 schools, they generally use
bus
Correct article usage
a bus
show examples
,
auto
Correct article usage
an auto
show examples
 rickshaw
or
Punctuation problem
, or
show examples
parents
Correct determiner usage
their parents
show examples
 drop
their children
Verb problem
them off
show examples
 because schools are mostly
nearby
Change preposition
near
show examples
 their
residence
Replace the word
residential
 areas
so
Punctuation problem
, so
show examples
Use synonyms
road
Correct article usage
the road
show examples
 is
common to use
Wrong verb form
commonly used
show examples
 in daily
life
Use synonyms
.
While
Linking Words
.
Punctuation problem
apply
show examples
road
Use synonyms
 safety is
most
Correct article usage
the most
show examples
 common issue for
every one
Correct your spelling
everyone
.So
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 spend more money for
road
Use synonyms
 it helps to enhance
safety
Correct article usage
the safety
show examples
 of
roads
Use synonyms
 and
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
readuce
Correct word order
reduces the rate of road accidents
show examples
road
Use synonyms
 accidents rate. In conclusion,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 should
utilize
Change the spelling
utilise
show examples
 valuable
grant
Check wording
grants
show examples
 for the preference of
people
Use synonyms
as well as
Linking Words
 need of
people
Use synonyms
 in their
day to day
Correct your spelling
day-to-day
life
Use synonyms
.
Railways
Use synonyms
 are safer,cheaper and more convenient
but
Punctuation problem
, but
show examples
roads
Use synonyms
 are useful in everyday
life
Use synonyms
.

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task response
Give a more clear answer in the first part. Say if you agree, disagree, or partly agree in a direct way.
task response
Write more about why rail should get more money or why road should get more money. Now both sides are there, but your own view is not strong enough.
task response
Use examples that match the main point more closely. Some examples are too general.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each body paragraph and explain it step by step.
coherence and cohesion
Use link words in a clear way, like first, also, however, and in conclusion. Be careful not to use them in a wrong place.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence order and joining. Some parts are hard to follow because ideas are not linked well.
task response
You answer the question and talk about both railways and roads.
coherence and cohesion
You include an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
task response
You use some examples, such as students going to school and train travel for older people.
Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • sustainability
  • environmental footprint
  • efficiency
  • pollution
  • cost-effectiveness
  • economic development
  • accessibility
  • public transportation
  • congestion
  • air pollution
  • initial investment
  • maintenance
  • upgrades
  • rural
  • urban
  • last-mile connectivity
What to do next:
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