Some people think high school graduates should travel or work for a period of time instead of going directly to study at university. Do the Advantages outweigh disadvantages?

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There is no denying the fact that periode after finishing high school is important.
While
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it is commonly held belief that taking a job or going abrod are one step that should be done before college, there is
also
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an argument apposes it. In my opinion, I consider that
advantages
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the advantages
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are
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apply
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far
more than
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outweigh
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any
disadvantage
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disadvantages
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for those people.
To begin
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with, working in the
summer time
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summertime
after graduation can be a
stress relife
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stress-relief
factor and changes the mindset for a responsible life.
In other words
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, the time spent in working hours and the salary provided really affect the way looking to life as a grown man.
For example
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, spending the money and adding
plane
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a plane
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for hole month will be considerable and skills of saving money will be increased. Another point to consider, traveling one of the most opening mind experiance to anyone, so for younger people can achieve multiple ideas about new
culture
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cultures
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and different personalities. It is
also
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possible to say
going
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that going
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to another country will expand thought and help to connect with all people
as
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, as
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it
will
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would
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be in university.
For instance
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, a traveller must stay and find resident, so if staying in hostle he has to share a room with another, where he will team up as in a student union. In conclusion, despite the different views, I believe that experiencing the real world can
prepar
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prepare
the
graduats
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graduates
for programs where it has to be independent and ready to take the responsiblty after spending years in famly condition life. Starting the next
chalenge
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challenge
will be
more easer
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easier
after coming out from comfort zone.

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task response
Answer the question more directly. Say clearly why the good points are stronger than the bad points.
task response
Add one short bad point, then show why it is less important than the good points.
task response
Make each main idea easier to understand. Some ideas are good, but the meaning is not always clear.
task response
Use examples that are more specific and more natural. This will make your points stronger.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has a clear start, body, and end, which is good.
coherence and cohesion
Use linking words more carefully. Some sentences do not connect well.
coherence and cohesion
Put one main idea in each paragraph and explain it step by step.
coherence and cohesion
Check sentence order. A few sentences are hard to follow because the order is weak.
task response
You give a clear opinion in the introduction and keep it to the end.
task response
You discuss both work and travel, which fits the topic well.
task response
You include examples to support your ideas.
coherence and cohesion
Your essay has an introduction, two body parts, and a conclusion.
coherence and cohesion
The paragraphs are in a logical order.
coherence and cohesion
Basic linking words like 'To begin with', 'Another point', and 'In conclusion' help guide the reader.
Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • gap year
  • practical experience
  • maturity
  • academic momentum
  • cultural exposure
  • diverse cultures
  • workforce
  • competitive edge
  • real-world skills
  • continuity
  • entry-level jobs
  • financial concerns
  • broadened perspectives
  • personal growth
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